He’s got a cunning plan!
An ace campaign consultant has drawn up an infallible plan for a “massive” Democrat victory in November’s midterm election. This “road map” has been leaked to us by several cowboys.
“All it’ll take is these six points!” says consultant Hu Phlung Dung. Let us summarize.
*”Elect Democrats and there’ll be no more hurricanes.” (“Got that from Senator Klobuchar,” Hu admits.)
*All male children are now female, and all female children are now male.”
*”Congress, if it has the courage to do so, can spend our way out of debt.” (“President Biden has always thought so!”)
*”The border is now, like, totally secure so you can all forget about it.”
*”Give a vote in our elections to anyone in the world who wants one! We’ll get a lot more really smart people voting, that way.”
*”All personal debt will be paid off by the federal government!” (“Who could possibly be against that?” he wonders.)
Mr. Hu is widely credited with engineering the upset victory of Gumby in Gumball, New York’s 2008 school board election. Gumby was running unopposed.