How My New Year Started

OK, I was up rather late last night. Couldn’t be helped. Our town has a midnight fireworks extravaganza that makes our building jiggle up and down.

Breakfast: a nice bowl of New England clam chowder. I like to sprinkle a bit of pepper on it. But I absent-mindedly screwed off the top and a whole bunch of pepper spilled out. So my soup was quite a bit hotter than I like it.

On the radio comes a blurb for the new movie version of The Great Gatsby. It “stars” Leonardo DiCaprio: sort of like casting a monkey in the title role. It also has a “music” soundtrack created by a couple of rappers screaming bloody murder while throwing their instruments down a long flight of stairs. You can hear it on youtube. I thought at first that it was the ghost of F. Scott Fitzgerald coming to take vengeance, with legions of demons at his back. This is cinematic crime of a very high order.

Then, when the wind outside died down, I thought I’d smoke a nice cigar outside. My habit is to poke a little hole at one end of the cigar with a knitting needle, so it will draw smoothly. I butchered the job; now the cigar won’t smoke at all. Couldn’t even get it lit. *sigh*

The rest of the year has just got to be better than this. As General Custer famously said, “We’ve got ’em now, boys!”


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