It’s the Midwest, sometime in the 1940s, and Ralphie wants a Red Ryder air rifle for Christmas… You’ve probably seen this classic film rendition of Jean Shepherd’s A Christmas Story.
So of course they remake it, with PC and Diversity slopping over the rim, and show it on TV the other night, and it bombs (http://www.abcgifs.com/a-christmas-story-live-the-worst-musical-ever-on-tv/).
But liberals never learn from experience, and anyway they kind of like failure: so now they’re going to remake Moby Dick. An unreliable source has given us the inside dope. And I do mean dope.
In this updated Diversity version of the Herman Melville classic, the good ship Pequod sails around gathering urgent data on Climbit Change. Led by Captain Gayhab, the crew consists of women of color, disabled persons in wheelchairs, a few transgender types, and at least one representative of every nation and culture on the earth. Of necessity, the ship is rather large.
Instead of hunting the White Whale, Captain Gayhab and his Diverse crew are hunted by the White Privilege Whale who’s trying to stop the global effort to reverse Climbit Change so that everybody in the world dies and Donald Trump makes a big profit–which, with everybody else dead, he’ll be hard-put to spend.
Oh–and it’s a musical.
Making it a musical is Islamophobic, since Mohammed prohibited musical instruments and singing. Tsk.
I can hardly wait!
Captain Gayhab haha. I’m thinking the white whale should be changed to black for the sake of diversity, then again they would probably call it racism. It’s so hard to comply with leftid rules.
If they decided on an Orca, that would be inclusive 🙂
Yep, the white whale must go. 🙂
I wasted the 3 hours watching A Christmas Story, the musical. One word:
HOR-EEW-BULL (horrible). I loved the original and this pathetic attempt to recreate the classic was the worst.
Moby Dick remake: Classic Duigon.
I have a T-shirt with the words on it “I triple dog-dare you.” I think you can imagine what picture is featured on it.