Democrats are fit to be tied, the witch-hunt having come up empty, the Mueller probe having utterly failed to find any evidence at all of “collusion” between Donald Trump’s campaign and “the Russians.” Wailing and gnashing of teeth.
But the Washington D.C. brain trust never runs out of ideas, and there’s already a new one sweeping up and down the aisles of Congress.
“We need a special prosecutor to investigate Trump’s non-collusion with the Russians!” This is a Democrat operative speaking, and our source is unimpeachable. “If he did not collude with the Russians, we can impeach him for that!”
Rep. Pookie Cholera (D-Mordor), vice-chair of the House Committee on Impeaching the &%$#&@ [lengthy list of expletives deleted], described the Mueller report as “a two-year cover-up, they planned to cheat us all along! We should have stuck to our motto: First punish, then investigate!”
“We’ve got him now!” exulted Sen. Albert Ringworm (D-Alternative Universe). “If he colluded with the Russians, that’s a crime. If he didn’t collude with the Russians, that’s a crime, too! One way or another, we’ve got him!”
Who here thinks I’m joking?