I has got to lagh at al themb dops thay “are” gointo Graduraite becose thay “are” Too Dumm to stayh in Collidge and aslo becomb reel Interllecturals!! Iff yiu Play yore “Cards” rihght yiu “can” stayh In collidge like fourevver!!!!
Butt we has got to go throogh This evry yeer so Last nihght we hadded “a” spacial meting “of” The Stodent Soviet to maike a Lisst of al the things we has to Stopp annyboddy from sayin “in” “a” Gratuaition Speach!!! It taked us al Niht long to doo it!! but it got to be dun Or Else yiu wil jist here a Lot of Racism and Biggitism and Trans Phobier and Bitumenism in al “themb” speaches!!!!!! Us who be on The Stodent Soviet we amn’t none of us Gradurating!!
Jist to give yiu peart of The lisst,, No Saying any religgin, no mail ore feemail Pro Nowns, no sayin the Nambs of enny Whyte Mens, nothing from no Books by Whyte Mens, –And jist to maike shoor evry Thing “it” gose alright,, we aslo maked it a Roole abuot What Yiu Has To Say In Yore Speach,; evryone whoo spekes, thay has got to Praze Divercity and Repoducty Rihghts and Socile Jutstus and thay has aslo Got “to” say Climbit Change it is reel and Donold Trumpt he is a Knotsy and Whyte Wimmim thay are no good tooo and Socile-Izzm it “is” “the” only whay!!!
So thare “are” A Lot of things no boddy thay are aloud to Say and aslo A Lot of things thay has got to say and iff thay Brake Our Rooles we “wil” Rip Up thare Dipploamers and not lett themb Graturate!!!!!!!!!
Editor’s Note: If you are as disgusted by the state of our colleges and looniversities as I am, below is a picture of something much more wholesome: a Fiji iguana.
Joe and his classmates may not be graduating, but they seem to have attained positions in various provosts’ offices that have indeed been issuing similar directives.
These remind me of the college students I witness to every week in Southern California…
Better you than me.
It seems certain majors are more likely to be like this sketch…
Y’mean like Nothing Studies?