Immortality for Chowderheads

I noticed a headline last night on the Drudge Report: Google predicts, in 20 or 30 years, “We can upload your brain!”

Does this mean that, 1,500 years from now, John McCain and Chuck Schumer will still be in the Senate? That no lefty judge will ever again have to retire from the bench? That Mayor Bloomberg will still be banning things when the sun cools and swells into a red giant? [Note to those who take rhetorical flourishes literally: the use of this figure of speech in no way denotes my endorsement of this or any other evolutionary scenario.]

Or is this just another instance of chattering monkeys making grandiose plans for some broken-off tree branch that they found?

Yes–the unbelieving evil humanists are going to give us immortality. “Ye shall not surely die,” the serpent promised Eve (Genesis 3:4). So they ate the forbidden fruit and they died, and the Devil has been conning their descendants with the same false promise ever since.

They’ll upload on to a disc or something everything that’s in your brain, every thought, every memory, everything that makes you you. When the disc gets worn, they’ll just transfer “you” to another. And nothing will ever go wrong with the disc or the computer! And they will never get careless and mix “you” with a commercial for cornflakes  or an old episode of “Let’s Make a Deal.” And it will all go on forever.

You have the Serpent’s word on it.

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