Tag Archives: joe collidge

Freee Speach It Dont Cover No Hat Speach!

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We had a Big demmastracion hear “at” Collidge this moning to forse them Biggits in Austrialier to leaglize Gay Marridge and then some Hater he come Along “and” saying Marridge jist a man And a wimmin i culdnt beleave Ennyone thay wuld say somthing So hatful And biggited so We al Beat him up and aslo we turned his Car over excep it turned out It Was “a” prefessers Car and he got kind of Mad!

And then we had a Teach-In and we lernt that Howerd the Deen, i dont know “waht Collidge he” is deen of but Iff he is a deen Then he must Be “exter” Smart, he sayed the Frist Ammendant it dont cover no hat speach and we Must Not Alow no boddy to say nothing aginst Diversity!! Enny One “whoo” deevates from *Diversity* thay got to be Stoped and throwed In Jale! thay has no Rihgjt to Dis-Respeck and Not Agreee with *Diversity*!!

I dint know thare is stil Cuontrys thay has Not leaglized Gay Marridge in Fact it shuld Be The “only kind” of Marridge that are alowed! but i gess Wee wil has to weit for Pressadint Obamma wen he’s Pressadint of the Worled and then Not have Gay Marridge “it” wil be Aginst The Law!!!

Wel alll that demmastraitin It made “me” hongry so i has got to fined Some sox to has for lunch! Becose To Morrow we has got a Even biggger demmastracion for Univercial Free Helath Care and aslo Univercial Free Tution at Collidge for as Long “as yiu” kneed to Stay thare and aslo Free Univercial Food! And iff we has Time “we” wil aslo demmastrait For “it” be Aginst The Law to say Any thing Bad abote Sceince!!!


Our Pubic Beleaf sistum!

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Thare was a artickle on this hear blogg “a feiw” days aggo, it show yiu jist “how” stopid that dum lee is, he didnt larn not “a” Singal Thing wen he “was” In Collidge al them yeers aggo and aslo he has Forgot evrything he lernt!! He comed rihgjht out “and” addmits he dont know “the” diffrints betwine pryvet beleaf sistum and Our officile and Good Pubic Beleaf Sistum!

Some teecher in some Scool somwear she sayed to some Other teecher I “wil prey for yiu!” Can yiu beleave anyboddy she wuld Say somthing So stopid??? So she got In Trubble like she desarved and thay tole her yiu cant do no Intergreating pryvet beleaf sistim With “our” pubic beleaf sistum and That moreon lee he say he dont evven know Waht Our Pubic Beleaf Sistum it Is!!!

Wel yiu dumby let Me inlihgtin yiu! Hear is ore pubic Beleaf Sistum!

Thare istnt No god so yiu cant say Nothing abote no preying! And evrything in yuor stopid Cristinity it is wrong, wrong, Wrong!! And Sceince it is Reel and It “is”awlyays Rihghjt and Soon it wil “be” Aginst The Law if yiu deenye Climbit Change and say yiu Dont beleave in Evilutoin! And aslo Bortion and Gaye Marridge it Is “aslo” rihghjt and yiu Better Cellarbrate it Or Else!!

So that it Is our Pubic Beleaf Sistum and if yiu dont like It “yiu are” jist a idjit and a Hater and a Biggit! He aslo say he dont know Who thinked up Our Pubic Beleaf, well duhhh! It Is us Interllecturals, We thinked It up and we Are smartter than Ordrinary dum peple, thats Whye we al in Collidge!!

And yiu Better “get whith” The Programb boy or wen Hillery she “is” finly Pressadint yiu goin to Get “a” Jale sentints!! Ha Ha Ha!!!

P.S. my prefesser he “jist tole” me i shuld rite Publick and not Pubic but it dont Reely mater becose its jist “as” troe eether whay!


How us Wimmin can Stop Globbal Wraming!

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I gess yiu ordrinary dum peple Who dont “go To” Collidge yiu probbly dont Know abote this grate Speach “from” Glorya Styenum so yiu nead a Interllectural to tell it To yiu.

Wow she hit “the” nale rihgjt on The hade!! Even i dint know this! She sayed wimmin thay Can stopp Globbal Wraming if they has enuhght bortions! Yes evry Time a wimmin have a bortion, she is fiting Climbit Change!! Becose one “of ” them Things that makes Climbit Change is when wimmins is Forsed Child Brith! and evry wimmin she shuld Have as manny bortions “as” she can and That it wil stop Globbal warming jist like that!!

She “is” so Hot and aslo so Cool!! and wen i heared Waht she sayed I runned rihgjht over To Our statchue of Pressadint Obamma and i preyed to him, I sayed Deer Pressadint Obamma now that yiu “are” a god sort of wuld yiu pleeze help me transmision to a Wimmim so i “can be) jist like Glorya Styenum and the frist Thing i wil do then is i wil have a Bortion!!! I wuld like “to” Stand on my haed to prey But my Moth Antenners thay gets in the Way!

Aslo i figgered out a Wimmin she can Have a Bortion any time she whants, yiu dont has to be pregganent to has a Bortion! i bett if a fore or fyve Billion Wimmins thay al had bortions at once thare wuldnt Be no Climbit Change at all!!!

Wel that is “how” wee Can Save The Planet and yiu De-Plorabbles yiu al Can jist Shut Up!!!!


Joe Collidge Hates This Blog

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Man I hate this blogg!! I hate them religgius “hims” and i hate them prares and i hate “al” the hat speach and Biggitry that stopid guy he “has” in this blogg!

And i hate “al that” stopid aminal stufff too! Like yeasterdday he have this stopid Arcticle “abote” some kind of Kimono Draggin it bited “some” guy’s leg. Waht a lode of Anti-sceince poo-poo!! Bille Niy he is Rihjght, we “must” awlyays lissen To Sceince and do “waht” Sceince says and Sceince it sayes thare isnt “no sutch” thing as no Kimono Draggin!

Yiu know waht he is doin? it is al “parrt of” him Climbit Change Denile! He “is tryin” To Scar ordrinary dum peple into Beleaving “in” draggins so thay wil Becolm christins and be anti-Sceince like him!! This hear is Whatt hapens when yiu Not a Interllutural and yore brane it dosn’t Work rihjght! that is Whye evry boddy whoo dont “go To” collidge thay shuld Go to jale “insted”!”

Im so Up-set, i wil prey to Pressadint Obamma that he Wil Come back “and” shut down This hear stopid blogg “four Good!!””


Sceince Dose it Agan!!

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I was washin my Prefesser’s Toylet Paper to Save The Planet it is reely hard “to” do becose i alyaws fall apart “befour” i can hang It Up to dreye whenn he Come in he has got Grate News!!

He sayed “soon thay goin” To has Compueters thay can “deleat” yuor thohghts without yiu Even know it hapens and The compueters thay can reed yuor Mind and aslo Put thuhghts In! He sayed boy “That “is” jist” fan tastic! “Thay can” take all The Bad thouhgts out and Put good thoohghts in!

Do yiu seee waht this meens!? Noboddy thay wont has no bad thuhhgts anymore! Us Intellecturals whoo are Smart we wil de-side waht Ordrinary “dum” peple thay wil “Think from” now on!! thay wil ownly Think watever thuohgts we lett Them think!! It wil bee lyke al of them thay are In “sensativvity trainin al” the tyme Evry day!!! So now “thay wil” al beleave in Climbit Change and Gender Fludity and Woorld Govermint! and aslo thare wont Be “no moore” christins and evry boddy wil suport A Wimmin’s Rihght To chose!

So yiu see it “is” jist lyke we alyaws Say, that Sceince it alyays has Got the Antser! and oncet We gets al “them ” Peple plugged In To the compueters thare Wont “be no” moar Questoins neether!!!


Ton ey Curtus’s Hand!!

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I seen a moovie “once” it was Al Abote The Vykings befour thay was a fotboll teem “and” thare was This guy Toney Curtus he got his “hand” choped off whith a Sowrd! and the rest “of” the moovie he didnt Have no Hand!

Wel lats nihght i seen another moovie with this guy Toney Curtus “in” it And waht do yiu know… his hand IT GROWED BACK!!! wOW! Yess thare it was, Two hands. One of my Moth Antenners it broke offf once But it growed rihght back Rihght “away” butt i dint know any one his hand “it” grow back!!!

I figgered Out it must of “ben” Sceince that make his “hand grow” back, Sceince reely is The Anwser! Evry Interllectural we knows that, It “is” wyh we al gone to Collidge!


Discrimbination aginst Peple who Arent Reel!

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Hear at Collidge we Are al hapy “becose” we got a New kind “of” Discrimbination to Protest and we “had” a big Protest jist this mourning!!

Yiu has herd of Racism and Sexism, wel now we has got to protest “aginst” Reel-ism!!! We jist dis-covered It this weak when A Unreel Person she posted this grate post in some Blog In “the” Hufinkton Post and then Thay puled it becose she “is Not” a Reel Person! (http://www.huffingtonpost.co.za/shelley-garland/could-it-be-time-to-deny-white-men-the-franchise_a_22036640/)

This it is Discrimbination puere and Simpul! If i am assined Mail Gender but i Self-Idintify as Femail wel That makes me A wimmin! So waht if i am a Ficktionle Person and i Self-idintify as a Reel Person, dont that Make me Reel???

Boy this has Been goin On “for” hunderds of yeares,al this hear Discrimbination aginst Peple who amn’t Reel!! And it is time Sosity we putt a Stop “to it!!!” Reel-ism it Is a squrge and it “is” aslo A hat crime aginst Socile Jutstace!! and anyyone who dose it thay are a Biggit! And we Are goin to Protest agane as sooon As we gets a New shipmant of Play-Doh!!

Un-Reel Peple “of” the Werld, rise up! Us Interllecturals at Collidge we wil leed Yiu to take yore ritefull Plaice!!!


Reeding Grate Litterture!

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Haters thay think jist becose we in Gender Studies “it” meanes we hasnt got no taiste in litterture! Boy is that stopid thing to say! We “are” Interllecturals so of corse we reed grate litterture al the time!!

I has reeded al the grates,, Spiderman and Battman and Trans Formers witch “is my” favrote becose al them chacterers thay “are” Trans Gender! and to-day we “had a” guesst lectrer she teached us al “abuot how” Not to reed Racist litterture wrote by Wite Privledge Hattero-Sexist Mails! Becose it wil Rot yuor Mind and yiu only shuld “reed” litterture by wimmim and gay and peple thay are Not wite!

She sayed the porpose of litterture it “is to” Expant yuor Mind and make you Self more Progrestive! so i buyed me a isstue of “this” Doom Patrol Comick becose it got a pitcure of this hear Wite Mail he turnt into a Monster part Tryanosaurrus and part Octapuss! i think he “looks” like Donold Trumpt! and it taked me a Long Time to reed it and then i Had “to” throw it Out becose it didnt have no Gay Heero in it! and Besides it was “kind of” Racist tooo!

From Now On i wil onely reed litterture that cellerbates Diversity and thare istnt no Bynary Gender peple in it!!! and i wented To our Statchue of Pressadint Obamma and prombised him I wuld nevver reed no more Strait Wite Prifflidge litterture no more! That sure Made me feeel better!

PS, somboddy he jist toled me That thare wasnt no Octapuss in that comick After All it was some “kind of” Tree insted so now i has got to treye to Get my monny back!!!


How we To Fix The Midleast!

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Thares this cuountry called Cereal or Somthing “like” that and The Rushians thay has took it over “so thay” can use it to Controll our electrons in Amarica and stopp Hillery from being Pressadint and then That big dop Donold Trumpt he gose and Bombs it!!! wel that is waht Hapens when yiu hastnt got No Interllecturals like us hear at Collidge runnning yore Fareingn Pollisy! And “that is” Whiy the World it is so messed up!!

Evryboddy knows Donold Trumpt he “wants To start” Worldwar III so he can maike Humin Beans exstinked and make A Huge Prophit!! Wel wee cant Let him doo that!!

The whay yiu fikx the Midleast is yiu Convints them al to Be Transgender that is waht wee lernt to-day In Gender Studies 666! Thay can al Still be Muslams but If al the men is wimmin and al wimmin thay is men then Thay “wil alll” be Hapier! To do this We wil has to Send them Nantsy Pullosy and Chuk Shoemer and aslo Jon Kerry he Is a War Hearo like Willam The conkerer! and thay wil Advice al the peple in Cereal how To Transision into Altranate Genders! And aslo to Maike them Feeel good abote “them Selfs” we must give them Nucular Whepins so thay can Bamb al them biggits and Racists whoo dint Vote For Hillery!!!

Thare is aslo peple thare caled Aribs but we jist Take them Out of Cereal and put them al in Sweeden and Germy, that “wil” maike Cereal less Crouded. And finily the Congris and Suepream Cort thay has got to Impeech Trumpt and make Hillery Pressadint and that wil Save The Plannit!!! And that is waht “us” Interllecturals we wuld doo to fiks The Midleast!


How we Wil stop Trump!

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Thay let me out “of” The infirmbery yeasterdday thay coldnt find nothing “wrong” With my brane evven thohgh i runned into the Class Room Dooor al that did Was it bended My Moth antenners! Thay thught i mihght of got A Concushion butt X-rays of my haed thay showed Nothing!

But oooh boy was I Up-set “whenh” i come Out of thare and i herd that No Good “Donold trump” he has Declaired War Aginst The Planet! and he throwed Out all Pressadint Obamma’s Climbit Change Regolatins and Trump he is goin To “make” the hole Humin Race extinked!!! jist so he Can make more Mony$$$!

Wel us Interllecturals hear At Collidge we has Got “to do” Somthing abote that!!! So ferst we played Whith Play-Doh and then “the” Prefesser of Spritulality she teached us This hear “thing” we can say Over And Over Again until Trumpt he is stoped coled! and yiu, yiu can Say it tooo and This is waht it is,

“klaatu barada nikto!”

It is a kinda Chant we got To Say like a Hundret times a Day “‘Klaatu barada nikto’ And it wil actavate The Force of The Unaverst and The Planet it wil get mad “at” Trumpt and Not let him De-stroy The humin race and The Planet it wil “take care of” him For good!!! Som stopid conservitive he aksed The Prefesser what “does it” mean klaatu barada nikto so She toled him to Shut Up and stop bein a biggit and makin hat speech and he “got” put in Sensortivaty Traning! that whil fix him!

wel my Antenners thay stil hurtin a lot but thay wil Be “okay” when i Get them stratened out.


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