Tag: joe collidge

Heer ‘Is” Waht We Reely Neeed!!! from 9/16/2022

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The History Behind Teepee Dwellings- Teepee Joy Blog

Yiu “are” nhow loooking At “a” pixture of the New Dorm we jist bilt heer At Collidge!!! We has figgred Out “waht” we reely neeed heer Is “moar” oh dam this it “is” Hard to spel!!! OK i got it= “Indagent-I-Zayshin”!”!

Yiu Are probbly aksing yore Self “Whel waht dose That “meen”?”?” I whil tel yiu! It meens maiking evry Thing jist lyke it wuz wen it was jist Indignant Peeople livving heer!!!!! Naytiff Amairakans!!!!! and no boddy Ellse!!!

Somb Hater she sayed ‘Waht iff” no boddy “wants to live In T.P.s insted of billdigns witch has Air Cundissioning and Sentril Heeting?”?”? but yiu Cant say “things” “lyke” that arowned Heer so six “Of” us we beet her Up!!!! She puled Out “one Of” my moth antcenners tho And “that” reely hert!!!!!

Fromb nhow On evry boddy thay has to Live “in” T.P.s becose That “is” “haow” It wuz befour Wyte peeple caime “And” ruinded Evry Thing!!!!!! Lookit Elizzabith Worrin!! Yiu can be Shure she is goingto Get Ridd “of” her stopid “Houwse” and live In “a” T.P. fromb nhow On!!!!! Heer At Collidge we “are” Tryying to has as mutch Intagratty as her!!!!!

Butt it whil Still “be” OK for reely impotant Peeple to live In Houwses!!!!

I Has Fowned Sumb-Thing ‘To’ Pro-Tesst!!!! Joe Collidge reprint

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11 Things You Shouldn't Keep in Your Glove Compartment ...

Sumbtymes I feeel Jellice becose “it” loocks lyke Evry Boddy butt me has fowned sumb-thing to Pro-tesst “abuout”!”! But too-day, Youreeka!!! I has gott “a” Pro-tesst “of” My Oan!!!!!! Haow grate “is” That???

Has yiu knowtissed that “thare” issnt no Gluvs in enny-boddy’s Gluv Cumportmint??? Thiss heer “it Is” a majer Skandle!!!!!! Go ahed and loock In one Gluv Cumportmint afftur a-nother!! Wahts “the” one thing yiu Will Nevver Fynde???

Gluvs!!!!!!

The hole “thing” it Is Nutthing butt Flase Avvertizing!!! Witch is cawzed by Climbit Chainge and Inkum Inny-quailatty!!!! This heer “It is” a Verry Impotent Isshoo!!! The car cumpannies thay “Are” liying “to” uss!!!!! And aslo Ghetting Awhay whith It!! And aslo yiu doughnt kneed Threee (&3) Gesses to gess whooze Be-hyned it!!! I whilll give yiu a Hint!

It”s Donuld Trumpt thats whoo!!!!!!!!

Ware “Are” awl themb Gluvs “that” shood awt Tobe in Gluv Cumportmints??? Eh? Eh?

I whil leeed a Pro-tesst to-nite!!!! And wen Pressadint Jobydin he fyndes auout,, then The furr it whil Flye!!!!!!!!!!

Now This Heer It ‘Is” Hyer Edducasion!!!!! REPRINT

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Cartoon vampire. Vector illustration with simple gradients. All in a single layer.

Is a lot “of” collidges run bye Vampires?

Heer at thiss hear collidge we “are” So Jellice of the Eunavursiddy of Whiskonsin!!! Do you “know” what they Got?? THEY GOT EKO-FEMBINISM!!!!!!

Thay has a prefesster too, “he” “is” fokissed on Trands-Giner Studdies, Queer Theery, Black femmanist theery, Vampire Litterture, and Germin litterture And “fillum” (https://www.campusreform.org/article/u-wisconsin-offers-lgbt-courses-queering-ecofeminism-performance-activism/26199). Wye caint “this” “g”uy teech At our collidge?!?! He musst “be”, lyke, The Smarttist “Man” In The Whorld [Not counting Pressadint Obomma, he “is” THE Smartist:,” hands down)!!!

Y’know, sumb-haow I knew thare hased “tobe” Vampires in this,, sumb-whare!! I betcha iff yiu “loooked” harrd Enugh and long Enogh yuiu wood Alyaws whyned Up whith Vampires!!!!!!! Thay Say the cheef pressadint of “our” collidge, he Is A VAMPIRE!!! Yiu nevver seen himb “eeting” Garlick!! I wunder iff The Mummy he is “in onn it” too!!! Betcha heeze In “The” Seller sumb-plaice!!! Whith Jobydin!!!!!!!

Speeking “of” Jobydin–wye doughnt thay Let himb be a Vampire??? Then “he” cood keeep On bein Preszadint!!!! Oar thay cood “maik himb” into a Mummy, jist a cupp-ful of Tana Leafs, thay “whil doo” the Trick!!!!!

Collidge ‘it’ Is Hard Sumbtimes! From 2018

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Sumbtimes Gender Studdies “it” is So hard butt our Prefesser xe knows “that” and xe Dont whant us “to” get al Stresszed Out so tooday xe taked Awaiy our Tecksbook becose it “Is” hard four us to reed thare Are a lott “of” big Words in “it” and makes Us feeel so Bad and so insted fromb now On wee wil Studdy car toons and graffic novles!! And aslo we wil get More Play Doh!

xe aslo gaved us This hear graffic Novle it “is” caled Oy Rodney and ze sayed we shuld Oauhght to studdy it to fined al “The” micro Gresions and biggity thats In it!! Xhe aslo ze sayed we Got to whach Out four al “the” Wite Privvlidge that in it and then We whill has a Test witch it shuld Not be “two hard” becose Al we “has to” Do is go out And key cars!!!

This hear Oy Rodney it “is” jist tarrible!!!!  That is becose “it” shoes jist wat Wimmins thay is Up “aginst” and aslo thare “Is” a lot of Sexule Horassmint in it tooo;, It makes “me” so Mad i has to Stopp and play whith Play Doh til my Moth Antenners thay stopp twitchin And wuld yiu beleave it I got in trubble for That!!! The prefesser xe sayed “Cant yiu” stop “that?? it is distracking al The “othher” stodents”! Wel i cant Help it its becose Of “al” them Moth Hormoans thay shot me Up whith to try to get my cromo-Soames to turn intto Wimmin cromo-Soames and i cant Help It if “the” exspearmint it dint work!!! So xe mayed me ware this hear Pointy Hat so no one thay “wuld see” my Antenners!

O wel! in jist Fyve moar yeers I “wil” Get my Batchler’s Deegree in Gender Studdies and “Than” i can start on My Masters! and Eaventurly i wil Be a reel Intrallectural!!!

Joe Collidge Discovers Cryptozoology REPRINT

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From July 10, 2020

I wented to “a” reel kool lexture “last” nihght it was all abuot a New Scyints i has nevver herd “Of” it is caled Clepto-Zoo-Olligy! Oar somb thing “lyke” That!!

Did yiu know thare is aminals alll Over “the” Whirld that noboddy thay has sceen themb befour??? Somb of themb is Dynasores and Willy mammeths but somb of themb “thay” are smawl aminals and clepto zooollagists thay “Are” loocking al Over “the” plaice to fyned themb!!!!

We seen a Lot “of” slydes of theeze Secret Creetchers lyke :the “ones” up thare In the Pixture,, i hasnt nevver sceene nothing Like themb befour,, thay live Up In “The” deeep wooulds ware thare “is” aslo Big Foot and Choopa Capra and the Lock Nest Manster!!!!! Somboddy whoo was jist “a” Biggit “and” a Hater he sayed thay “are” Ownly plane old Rabbets so we beet himb up,, that is reel Socile Jutstus!!!!

Heer is anether Clepto Aminal.

Considering Consciousness Through The Eyes Of A Squirrel : 13.7: Cosmos And Culture : NPR

At frist i thinked I sceene One “Of” theeze onct rihght hear On Our Campis it was clyming “a” Treee but ackturally it is a Seecrit Clepto Zology Creetcher it livves in Affricker and the Naytivves thay are al Afrayed of it!!!! The lexture sayed it jist gose “To Shoh” that thare is Seecrit Creetchers evry ware!!!

The lexture thay sayed theeze aminals thay Are Prooof that Evilusion it is Reel and evin Peeple thay are goingto Evolve “into” somb thing Elsse so i amb goingto Keep a Iye out fore “it”!!!!!!

Joe Collidge Drops Out! REPRINT FROM 2024

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I doughnt Know wye “that thare” hedline is up thare, making Peple “think” I amb Droping Out of Collidge!!! Sumbboddy thay are Trying “to” maik me look stupid!!!!!

What reely hapened was, I fell Off these here big bawls we “were bounsing Araound to raze munny foar Kamalala to git E-lektid Pressadint! It’s Not “as” eezy as it looks!! So I was “bountsing” aroaund wen I thawt I seen Jobydin! bowncing on a big red bawl and it maid me fawl off!!!! And wen I looked agin,, he waznt thare!!!!!!

This prooves that he has Magickle Powers!!!!

We has sended Off “a” leter to Kamalala aksing Her to c”ome” to our Campis and bounse whith us!!!!! Thar wil “kill off” the roomers that she “is” a Which!!!!!! Gotta do “that” befoar its Halloween!!!!

Joe Collidge: Movie Review REPRINT

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From August 2, 2019

I seen a reely Grate movy last “nihght” thay showed it to us “in” Nothing Studies and i didnt get the Tital it was in Chineese but anyhow “it” was ether a Brittish movy or Check i dont “know,, i get themb two contries mixted up sombtimes!!

It was al abote Climbit Chainge maiking “the” whorld come to a end and this evel pressadint he was like Donold Trumpt,, he ownly whanted Evryboddy to Die!!! so he culd maik a prophitt!!! So he woodnt let annyboddy Save The Planet But ha-ha-ha the joak “it” Was “on” himb wen he got Drownded becose the see-levels they comed up over “the” Wite Howse and he coodnt swimb!!! That was Lanardo Dee Cabron who played himb!!!

In depsaration the whorld it turned to wimmin of culler and “one” “of” themb she Got To be Pressadint of the hole Whorld and she fixted evry Thing!!! She made a 110$% tax raite and Open Boarders and lots more Transgender and rihght away evry Thing “it” strated to Get Beter!!! And then yiu know watt she done?? She “got” A hole buntch of Whiches to make a magickle spel and that putt “a” Stopp “to” al the Bad Whether!!!! And than wee hadded Comunism and evry Thing “it” Was Purfict!!!!

I love themb movyes wen thay “are” abote Socile Jutstus i whish thare was Moar Of themb and the Guvernmint thay shood maik evryboddy See Themb over and over agen!!!!!!!!!!

Byron the Quokka vs. Joe Collidge: It’s War REPRINT

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G’day! Why did the quokka cross the road?

To try to get some views!

Byron the Quokka here, mates; and it looks like our little bet with Joe Collidge, over who can get the most views, is getting out of hand. Joe has his whole Student Soviet compulsively clicking onto his last post. Good thing they forgot you have to turn the computer on first. Like, if you don’t see anything on the screen, there’s nothing there.

Here at Quokka University, we don’t cheat but we’ve only got the one computer and everybody here has already seen my last TV listings. So we are relying on humans who do not live on Rottnest Island to help us hold our own against those wackos at the college. We do not want to lose the bet and have to give that simpleton an honorary degree from Quokka University–and be laughed at by wombats for the rest of our lives.

Give us a leg up, eh?

What’ll We Do With Millenials? REPRINT

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From January 16, 2017Image result for images of useless college students

We have a gigantic social problem looming over our country.

What are we to do with millenials?

Recent college graduates, tens of thousands of them, with their whole lives yet to live–can’t hold jobs, can’t tolerate even the most trivial adversity, saturated with an ideology that is opposed to everything America stands for, unable to relate to people as individuals but only as representatives of this or that group, guaranteed and certified 100% useless–what in the world are we supposed to do with them?

Don’t get me wrong. I enjoy the company of teens and tweens, provided they haven’t been turned upside-down and inside-out by our culture and our schools. I wish I had more of you guys visiting this blog, to pep it up a little.

No, I’m talking about young people with degrees in Gender Studies and Social Justice, burdened by a load of student debt, who go stampeding for the Play-Doh and the Safe Space at the first little hitch in life that comes along, who want a participation trophy just for breathing. You can’t talk to them without triggering a trauma. And if you can imagine them trying to bring up children of their own, you have a more vivid imagination than I do.

So what are we supposed to do with them? They won’t be able to support themselves. Imagine hiring Joe Collidge to do anything more complex than sweep the floor.

I wish I knew the answer to that question.

The Forgotten Worlds of Joe Collidge REPRINT

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“”The Presisstints of Memry”” by Sal Maglie (oar sumb-boddy)

From April 27, 2025

I dunno whAt hes Talking “about!”!” I hasnt forgot nothing!!!! Hes the One Whoos loosing “his”” Memry!!

Our Nothing Studdies prefesser, Dr. Limbo, “he has” Starrted a Exspearmint and I sined Up “tobe” In It!!!!!!

What “if” we was awl Baybys wen we starrtid Collidge?? And lyke 18 oar 19 oar twinty20 yeers Old wen we starrtid Kintergardin??? Prefesser Limbo he “says it” wood maik Us “beter human beans”!”!” So nhow wen We “go” To lextures and stuff,, we gots to ware Dypers and be in Craydals and drink Millk fromb Bayby bottels.

And the prefesser he says “Try” to “Forgett (!) evry thing you Evver lernt sints yiu frist wendt “to” Kintergardin” so yiu Can lurn All Oaver Agin!!!!!!!”” And sumb of us we doughnt “has to” try tooo hard!!!

Has we bin “livving” Backwords awl Thiss tyme??? Betcha we did!!! We shooda STARRTED in Collidge wen we was Baybys and whorked Out “whay” baCk to Kindygarddin!!!!

We whil Get It Ryte thiss tyme!!!!