Wel its abote Time!! Us Interllecturals hear “at” Collidge we Are tyred of them De-ploribles and rihght-Wing Biggits and Haters thay alyaws atacking Us and sayin Wrong Pronons and so we goin To “do” waht stodents and Progrestives thay doin al Over “the” cuontry and That is we goin to “have” a Self Deefence Traning Club!!! jist like at Lots “of” otther Collidges! (http://www.shtfplan.com/headline-news/watch-the-left-prepares-for-war-with-new-self-defense-training-club_06272017)
Al yiu has got To do is paye $6,0000 and thay trane yiu to fihght! We has got a nice Transt-Gender Persson (&) is goin to teech us and Wahts reely Grate “abote it” is (&) going to teech Us whith-out Goin intto no Hetro-Normotivve Male Gym Cultture! like That stuf it is so mail so we not goin to lern no Joodough and no Karroty, that is Way “tooo” male. No, we goin “to”” lern specile Fihghtin Skils thay wil Impower “us” to beet up cristins and al them Otther Fashists!!
I evin got A Chants to tallk to The Transt-Gender Persson and (&) sayed Lets “see yuor” Munny wel of corpse i hasnt Got none butt (&) sayed may-bee We “can” work Sumthing Out becose (&) hasnt Never teeched “noboddy whith” no Moth Antenners befour! (&) sayed my Moth Antenners thay mihght Be a Vunnerble Spot! I sayed thay Sure do Hurt wen sumboddy pulls them.
Wel i hop my traning It starts reel “sooon” so I “can” De-fend my self aginst That Biggit that my frends and me we beet up “jist the”” otther Day i think he mihght be Mad “at” us.
I went and seen a play Last nihght it “was” Julio’s Seezure wrote by some “guy” his Name its Shakaspeer, it was”at” the Stodent Centaur And it was “put on” by our Collidge’s own Socile Jutstus Players but thare Wasnt noboddy named Julio in it “and” noboddy thay had no seezure! Insted it was al theese guys thay Was waring towls and Bed Sheats and thay caled them selfs Romins, i has no Idear waht “that” was al abote!
Besides, it Was al abote Donold Trumpt!!! Frist thay coldnt find noboddy who wantedd “to” play him but finely Some boddy he sayed he wuld “do it”, The showe must go on!!
Wel i was geting pretty Board and then abote haffway “threw” the Play soddenly evry Boddy thay al stabed Donold Trumpt to deth!!! WOW! Blood all over The plaice!! and then it was OOPS! becose thay reely stabed him “and” he was reely ded, dead, deadd!! and evry Boddy thay al kinda freeked out!!
So the cops thay came and aksed A Lot of qeustoins and finely thay taked Away “the” boddy it sure was “a” Mess! and A Lot of us we was warried and We al preyed to Pressadint Obamma to make nobody get in trubble we awlyas preys to him becose us Interllecturals at Collidge we “know thare”” isnt no God!!
Abnd this “moarning” goood neuws!! The Prosticuter he “is” a Dembocrat and he sayed “it was” jist a axiddint or may be Suecide but it sure wasnt No murrder so thare wont be no Boddy gets errested!!
And my Prefesser he sayed it dont Matter becose Donold Trumpt he “is so” Bad, even if yiu jist preetend to be him yiu jist as bad as him is and It “surves” yiu rihght to get stabed and kilt!!!
But i mussed Con-fest I sort of losed My appertight wen i seen al That bloood on them nice sheats and towls!
Waht a grate Play thiouhgh!!!
[Warning: a bit more revolting than usual. But that’s our culture.]
Hear at Collidge we “are” goin to Hit Trans Phobbia good “and” Hard! Thare “is” a Trans bloger she ze? reely sayed it When xe sayed and i qote, “”Not being Attracted to trans peple it is deeeply Trans Phobbic”” (http://www.dailywire.com/news/17419/apparently-youre-deeply-transphobic-if-you-dont-amanda-prestigiacomo)!!
Wel us Interllecturals we al say “it” is a biggit Hat Crime not to sleeep With Trans peple and So we revolve To Do Somthinge abote it!! Wee are Settin “up a” Cammitty that Wil deside who yiu goin To sleeep With! And aslo the cammitty it “wil” deside whoo yure Frends are and it wil Pick Them for yiu!!! Thiss is neseccary becose peple thay is All Biggits at harte and thay is Not Diverss enuohgh in Thare Frend Ships!!!
I amb not Trans Phobbic in Facked i amb deeeply Atractored to Trans Peple! I amb tryin to be Trans tooo and That is “wy” i “get” shoot Up whith al them Moth Hormoans only al it done “so Far” is jist To make thees Moth Antenners groan out of my Fourhead and aslo make Me “wantt” To Eat sox and Hankerchiffs!! Aslo i ait a peece of a Carpit once but It was awful Diffaclut to chewe! So i willlin to sleeep With any Trans Parson iff thay wuld “jist give” me a Chanse!! Al them peple whoo thay Wont have “Secks” with me thay are Biggits tooo!
Yiu see Now that ordrinary dum Peple thay are “tooo” stopid to chews thare owen Frends and Secks Pratners that “is” wy Us Smart Interllecturals we has got to “do” it four them!!!
And that wil leed To troue Socile Jutstus!!!!
Oh did i here a grate lexture last Nihght!! It was bye Our “specile guesst” at Collidge she is A prefesser “of” Femnist Inter-Sexional Byology and she telled us how orgineraly al the First “humins” thay was jist gay wimmin Veggertarians and thare wasnt no mails!! Thats rihghjt, thare was onely Wimmin!!!
Thare wasnt no men Come along “untill” mutch Later wen The mails thay Evolved from some Kind of munkey that the Wimmin thay “keeped” as pets! and that “is” wen Evalution it started and them little munkeys “thay” Evolved into Cave Men and thats wen humins thay begun “to go” Down Hill!!! I forget waht kind Of munkeys thay was,, thay had a Sceintiffick name thats reel Hard to spel
This hear lexture it Made “a” lot of Things cleer to me that i diddnt undrestand befour! Like it was them Mails that infented Captolism and thay “forsed” evry One to do it and then Even wursse thay infented Religgin and thay forsed “evry One to” do that tooo! And thats How evry Thing it got so bad wen It “used to” be goood!
So iff we want To make humins good agian we Got to Transsission evry boddy “back” to Femail, witch Sceince it have showed Us how “to doo it!! and then Hillery she wil finely “be” the Pressadint insted of that Trumpt althuohgh wen he transes into a wimmin too he wont “be so” bad no more!!
Iff yiu has not joyned #The Resistiance “yet” wel whatt Are yiu weiting for?? Yiu must be a reel stopid Racist Biggit!
Yeasterdday that Donold Trumpt he shuld Not be pressadint it shuld “be” Hillery, he went and busted “the” Intrenatonal Climbit Change Treety! That it was jist “whatt” them Russhans thay wanted him “to” do!! And now he going To Kill Everybody in the Worled and Destroy The Planit jist so he “can” make a big prophit!
Yiu jist weit til Climbit Change it takes Aweiy al the Air and yiu cant Breeth no more and aslo Every place it wil alll be Under Water!!! then yiu willl al be Sorry but it Wil “be tooo” late!! Keeth Odorman he “was” rihgjt wen “he was” on TV and he sayed Al the intellerginces in al The ohther countrys thay has got To get ridd of Trumpt! He wuld Not be on TV iff he wasnt reel Smart!
Butt no! No boddy thay didnt lissen “to” him and Now look waht hapens!
I has alyaws sayed The onely thing this evel Racist contry fill of De-Plorribles has got goin for It that “is” Us Interllecturals hear at al The Collidges and now We Are “the” only Ones that Can Save The Worled witch meens al yiu Odrinary Dum Peple yiu got to Obay us from now on!! And the frist Thing yiu got to Do is overthrough Trumpt!! Befour The Planit it runs Out “of” air and We al gets drownded!! This gots to Be done rihgjt now!!!! and then we musst make Hillery the pressadint and Pressadint Obamma he musst be Pressadint of The Worled becose onely he “is” smart enuhgh!
Rememember, thare cant be No more life On This Planit unles yiu obays us Interllecturals!!!
We had a Big demmastracion hear “at” Collidge this moning to forse them Biggits in Austrialier to leaglize Gay Marridge and then some Hater he come Along “and” saying Marridge jist a man And a wimmin i culdnt beleave Ennyone thay wuld say somthing So hatful And biggited so We al Beat him up and aslo we turned his Car over excep it turned out It Was “a” prefessers Car and he got kind of Mad!
And then we had a Teach-In and we lernt that Howerd the Deen, i dont know “waht Collidge he” is deen of but Iff he is a deen Then he must Be “exter” Smart, he sayed the Frist Ammendant it dont cover no hat speach and we Must Not Alow no boddy to say nothing aginst Diversity!! Enny One “whoo” deevates from *Diversity* thay got to be Stoped and throwed In Jale! thay has no Rihgjt to Dis-Respeck and Not Agreee with *Diversity*!!
I dint know thare is stil Cuontrys thay has Not leaglized Gay Marridge in Fact it shuld Be The “only kind” of Marridge that are alowed! but i gess Wee wil has to weit for Pressadint Obamma wen he’s Pressadint of the Worled and then Not have Gay Marridge “it” wil be Aginst The Law!!!
Wel alll that demmastraitin It made “me” hongry so i has got to fined Some sox to has for lunch! Becose To Morrow we has got a Even biggger demmastracion for Univercial Free Helath Care and aslo Univercial Free Tution at Collidge for as Long “as yiu” kneed to Stay thare and aslo Free Univercial Food! And iff we has Time “we” wil aslo demmastrait For “it” be Aginst The Law to say Any thing Bad abote Sceince!!!
Thare was a artickle on this hear blogg “a feiw” days aggo, it show yiu jist “how” stopid that dum lee is, he didnt larn not “a” Singal Thing wen he “was” In Collidge al them yeers aggo and aslo he has Forgot evrything he lernt!! He comed rihgjht out “and” addmits he dont know “the” diffrints betwine pryvet beleaf sistum and Our officile and Good Pubic Beleaf Sistum!
Some teecher in some Scool somwear she sayed to some Other teecher I “wil prey for yiu!” Can yiu beleave anyboddy she wuld Say somthing So stopid??? So she got In Trubble like she desarved and thay tole her yiu cant do no Intergreating pryvet beleaf sistim With “our” pubic beleaf sistum and That moreon lee he say he dont evven know Waht Our Pubic Beleaf Sistum it Is!!!
Wel yiu dumby let Me inlihgtin yiu! Hear is ore pubic Beleaf Sistum!
Thare istnt No god so yiu cant say Nothing abote no preying! And evrything in yuor stopid Cristinity it is wrong, wrong, Wrong!! And Sceince it is Reel and It “is”awlyays Rihghjt and Soon it wil “be” Aginst The Law if yiu deenye Climbit Change and say yiu Dont beleave in Evilutoin! And aslo Bortion and Gaye Marridge it Is “aslo” rihghjt and yiu Better Cellarbrate it Or Else!!
So that it Is our Pubic Beleaf Sistum and if yiu dont like It “yiu are” jist a idjit and a Hater and a Biggit! He aslo say he dont know Who thinked up Our Pubic Beleaf, well duhhh! It Is us Interllecturals, We thinked It up and we Are smartter than Ordrinary dum peple, thats Whye we al in Collidge!!
And yiu Better “get whith” The Programb boy or wen Hillery she “is” finly Pressadint yiu goin to Get “a” Jale sentints!! Ha Ha Ha!!!
P.S. my prefesser he “jist tole” me i shuld rite Publick and not Pubic but it dont Reely mater becose its jist “as” troe eether whay!
I gess yiu ordrinary dum peple Who dont “go To” Collidge yiu probbly dont Know abote this grate Speach “from” Glorya Styenum so yiu nead a Interllectural to tell it To yiu.
Wow she hit “the” nale rihgjt on The hade!! Even i dint know this! She sayed wimmin thay Can stopp Globbal Wraming if they has enuhght bortions! Yes evry Time a wimmin have a bortion, she is fiting Climbit Change!! Becose one “of ” them Things that makes Climbit Change is when wimmins is Forsed Child Brith! and evry wimmin she shuld Have as manny bortions “as” she can and That it wil stop Globbal warming jist like that!!
She “is” so Hot and aslo so Cool!! and wen i heared Waht she sayed I runned rihgjht over To Our statchue of Pressadint Obamma and i preyed to him, I sayed Deer Pressadint Obamma now that yiu “are” a god sort of wuld yiu pleeze help me transmision to a Wimmim so i “can be) jist like Glorya Styenum and the frist Thing i wil do then is i wil have a Bortion!!! I wuld like “to” Stand on my haed to prey But my Moth Antenners thay gets in the Way!
Aslo i figgered out a Wimmin she can Have a Bortion any time she whants, yiu dont has to be pregganent to has a Bortion! i bett if a fore or fyve Billion Wimmins thay al had bortions at once thare wuldnt Be no Climbit Change at all!!!
Wel that is “how” wee Can Save The Planet and yiu De-Plorabbles yiu al Can jist Shut Up!!!!