We Awl Get A “A’!!!

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Thayre braging Over “at” Yail abuout 80% of “The” stoodints gitting A’s,, butt heer At our Collidge ((Fimbo U.!) we Are dooing beter Than That!!!!

Awl “of” us we Are geting a A in evry singul coarse!!!!!! Now that’s eddicasion!!!!

I thinck it Was “the” Ainchint Geek phallosoffur Anopheles whoo sayed “that evry” skool oar collidge aut to givve Awl A’s awl the tyme!!! “Thats ware The munny is!” he sayed! Whel he was Rihght!!!!!!!! I jist got a A in Superhero Nothing Studdies and I diddnt Even “pass the” Finyl Exxamb!!!! ((I foregotted whoo Spyder Man was!!)!

Geting Awl A’s it “is” goood foar The Selph Esteam!! And it preepairs themb stoodints “foar Lyfe” and jobs and stuph!!!! Our Stodent Soviet we dee-manddid that evry boddy But Crischins shood “get a A in” evry coarse!!!!! Immadjin haow That “wil loock” wen a gradjurite apleyes Foar a jobb “as a Dyvarsity And Inclution offasir whith Targit oar Budd Lite oar sumb plaice!!!!!

So, 80 pursent A’s that Is nuthing!!! Eet yore hart out, Yail!!!!!!

Our Criptical Drag Kween Shortidge!!!

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“Take” a goood loook at this hear em-tee Class Roomb!!! This is waht hapens wen yiu has Got “a” Drag Kween Stoary Hoar and no Drag Kween showes Up!!!!

And Wye, yiu deemanned, wasnt There “no” Drag Kween???

Becawse thare “issnt enuough” Drag Kweens to go araound!!!! Becawse thay’se all gawn To alimentary skools and loacle Liebaries!!!!! And “thare” aint enuough Lefft to has Drag Kween Stoary Hoar heer “at” Collidge!!!!!!

Our hole contry it has got “a” Drag Kween shoartidge!!! And I doant Cair “waht” yiu Say,, us stoodints heer At Collidge we “dezerv” our Drag Kween Storie Hower tooo!!!!! Iff we didd, that thare Class Roomb it wood “be” full!!

Wye dint “the” Guvvermint provyde Moar Drag Kweens?? (Sumb Boddy sed thay shiped a lott “Of” themb to Youkrane butt i doughnt beleave It!) Haow cood This “shortidge” Ockur??? O shur,, the dee-mand it “is” Very Hi!@! Butt iff we caint fyned enuough Drag Kweens to mete “The” dee-mand,, waht dose That “say” abuout Amairicka?? Eh???

We nead The Guvvermint “to” sine Up moar Drag Kweens!!! Prinnt sumb moar Munny and pay themb to go to awl The collidges!!!!!!

We ‘Give’ Thancks to Pressadint Obomma!!!

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We hadded a toatilly Un-Nessasairy contrav (I doughnt know haow “to” spel the Rest) hear at Collidge becose sumb Hater thay spyed “On” our Stodint Soviet Thancks-givving!!!

We awl “got” togither to Givv thancks and prey to Pressadint Obomma,, we hoalded Hands “and” dantsed Aruoung his Stachoo!. Mayby yiu ree-memmber a wile Ago the Hedd it fell Off “the” stachoo and we cuddnt gloo It “back” On so we putted A Punkin thare in-stedd, like yiu Can “sea” in the Pixture!!

Awlso we want to has a stachoo of Pressadint Jobydin “so” we can warship himb Too butt we are Out “Of” punkins but mayby we can Use “a” Graipfroot for his Hedd. Sumb boddy thay whil has to “draw a Faice” on itt!!!!!

The Funniest ‘Joe Collidge’ Ever

I Wanted to Be Superman. I Failed. | Psychology Today Ireland

I happened to encounter this post yesterday. Was that the one with all the funny comments? Yes, it was–“Souper Man He Is Woke!!!” And not to blow my own horn, but it gave me a laugh and I think it’ll do the same for you.

Souper Man he Is Woke!!!!

Really, I’m so tired of superheroes! And movies based on comic books. It tires me out just to know there are people “studying” this **** in college, and paying wheelbarrows full of money for the privilege.

Wye We ‘Nead’ Two (2) Dickshinairies!!

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We hadded a Brillyint lexture tooday “in” Nothing Studdies!”!” It “was” awl abuot Incollusion!!!

Trye “to” unnerstand this “heer” Poynt,, it “is” Very suttle!!!! Waht Is “the” diffrints betwean Incollusion “and” Excollusion??

Incollusion is wen we Do it,, and Excollusion is wen thay do it!!!! Wen we Do it, that Is Socile Jutstus! Wen thay doo it, that is Hait!!!! and aslo Racism! This gits conphusing!!

That it is wye we nead Two dickshinairies-(-one foar us Good Peeple and “The” other for awl themb Biggits out thare!!!!!! Otherwyes a dickshinairy it wood Be Too Big and reel hard “to” Carry aruound!!!! And besydes noboddy butt “a” Racist wood whant the Racist dickshinairy!!!! And We sirtinly doughnt whant enny “of” thayr Hatful wirds in our dickshinairy!!!!!!

Ownly by geting Ridd of no-good stinkin biggits, Ownly be excolluding themb, will we evver has incollusion!!!!!!!!!!

See haow Suttle that is?? Yiu has to Be “in” collidge a Long Tyme befoar yiu Are smart enuough To unnderstan It!!!!!!

We Nead ‘A’ Weeed Man Date!!!!!

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Yiu whant “to” know watts Wrawng whith Amairicka? I whil tel yiu!!!

We doughnt smoak Enuff wead!!! And wye Is “that,, yiu assk”?”?” Becawse we hasntt got “no Man Date” to maik “it” Cumpulssary!!!!

Us at the Stoodint Soviet we “are” riting A Leter “to” Pressadint Jobydin dee-manding himb to maik it a Executrive Odor and a Man Date “that fromb” Nhow On evvry boddy thay has to smoak Marrawanna evvry Day!!!!!

This heer it whil mayk the hole Contry mutch moar Mello!!!!!! Are yiu wurryed abuot Darnold Trumpt tayking oaver agin??? Well ha ha ha!!!!!!! Iff evvry boddy smoaks Moar Wead, thay woont evin Re-membber whoo “he” Is!!!!  And it woont mater that evvry boddy thay Are Stoaned awl “the” tyme and cant Think “of Nothing!”!” We has Arta Fisshil Intelerginse A,I! to doo awl “the thincking” foar Us!!!!!!! That whil alouw us to rite Cowboy Pottery and Play viddio gaimes and get Ginder Affurming Cair as mutch “as” we whant!!!!!!!!!

Nhow “it” mite Be Nessasairy to Maik peple smoak Pott but its fore thare Own Goood and anyhaow No boddy has a Rite “not to obay” the Man Date!!!

And dought whurry abuot Cost!!!! The U-N it whil alyaws help us Pay “fore” It!!!!

Hillery She ‘Is’ A Preffesser Nhow!!!!!


Doughnt mess whith Her!!!

I did not know this! Hillery, she is a Preffesser “at” Columbo Younavarsity!! Butt thats Not “awll!”!”

Wood yiu beleeve It??? She was “giving a” lexture, she Is “the” Smartist Wimmin in “the” whorld–and a hole buntch Of stoodints “thay” walkked Out “on” her!!!!

This heer “it Is” insterrecxion,, It is Treezin!!!!!! Themb stoodints thay shood Awl “be” “in” Jale!!! Like fourevver!!!!

Nhow Jobydin he Is dooing a phantatstic Jobb “as” pressadint butt he Cant doo It aloan!! It is tyme we changed The Consatusion back To waht “it Was” wen she Was Coe Pressadint!!!!! And Borat Obumma he shood “be” maid Pressadint of Pressadints!! Whith themb Three in charj,, our Couontry it whil fynelly Be Grate!!!!!!!

I cant Tell yiu waht her Lexture it “was awl” abuot,, it whent Way “oaver” my Hedd!!!!! Thats haow Smart Hillery she is!@!! Ordrinary peple thay Are jist “tooo” Dum to undder stand her!!!!

Our Stodent Soviet we Are draphting A Letter “to” Hillery aksing her To Be Coe Pressadint aggin!!!!!!!


Collidge It ‘Is’ Nott “In’ Trubble!!!!!

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Enrolemint down?? Hah!!! Then waddaya caul This???

We keeep heering “that” Hyer Eddication “it is” in Deep Doo-Doo and it is goingto Fale and Go Broak and no boddy thay whil Be Smart enny moar!!!!!! What a big fat lye!!!!!!

Now thayr Tell”ing” us enrolemint It Is down-down-Down!!! That its Down by oavur A Millyin stodents!!!! since 2020 but that “was” a badd yeer and evin Pressadint Jobydin he cuddnt “Saive” it!!!!

Well thats jist Krazy!!!!!!! Look at waht weeve “got!”!” Ginder Studdies!!! Nothing Studdies!! Trans Studdies!!!! Evry “kyned” Of Studdy yiu can thinck Of!!! And tuns and tuns of Stoodints all oavur The plaice!!!!!! (I seen themb!!!)

But nevvir myned!!!!! Heer “at” The Stodint Soviet, we has thunk up a Sollucion!!!

GOVVERMINT IT MUST ACKT!!!!!!!! Govvermint shood maik A Man Date!!!!

No maor foooling arownd!! Collidge it Must Be maid Cumplossary!!! No moar stayin hoam!!!! Evvry parson In Amairca thay “Must!!!” Go To Collidge and “stay thare” till thay get “a” Deegree!!!!!! Becose Eddacasion it “Is” Our Moast Impotent Produck!!!!!!! And this whay Thare wil has to Be “Moar Collidge” not Lest!!!!!!!

Of coarse iff Evvry Boddy thay “go to” collidge thenn The cuountry it whil knead Moar Collidges, moar prefessers, More bill dings, moar Pentions, and a lott Of us we whil Becumb prefessers and Nott jist Stoodints enny moar!!!!

I amb reddy to Teech!!!!!!

We ‘Are’ Maiking Pogres!!!

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Nhow weer’e geting Sumbware!!!!

A big impotent Pole says Haff! the peple in The Party “thinck” thare “is” whey Too Mutch Freedum “going” arownd And “the” guvvermint thay shood (and “I” kwote!) “regrulate And restrick the expretion Of Views considderd Discrimbatory oar ofenssive”” and jist Put a Lidd On “It”!”!”

Heer at Collidge us in “the” Stodent Soviet we has volunteerd to Set Up “a” Speach Cort!!! and enny boddy who Says oar Rites ejectionable Things thay “wil” be Punnishd!!!!!!

No-boddy has no rite To Say Rawng Things!!!!!!! Thare shood awght To Be Speach Corts evvryware! And camras and mikerowe-foans to Wach “and Lissin”!

Nhow “of coarse” The Guvermint whil de-side “waht” Speach it is ofennsive “and” waht Issnt!!!!!! Whaitll Miss Infomasion gets Slaped Down!!!! She woont Know waht “hit” hur!!!

And yiu whil awl See waht A “Grate Contry” thist whil Be wen no-boddy but us thay Are aloud “to” say Things!!!!!!! No Moar Too Mutch Freedum!!!!!!!!

Wy Woont Thay Lissin ‘To’ Hillery???

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Hear “at the” Stoodint Soviet we Are M-A-D! at Jobydin foar Not “dooing” waht Hillery she says!!!! Doughnt he know she Is “the” Smarttist Wimmin “in The” whirld??

So natcherly becose he doughnt Taik “goood advyce” he nevver Yet “got” startid rownding Up awl themb MAGMA biggits and Haters and Racists who Are “tryingto” reck Our Dimmocrassy!!!!!! Lyke Hillery she sayed, thay has got “To Be” lockt Up and dee-pogromed!!!! Becose it is agginst The Law to has themb kynd Of thawts!!!!!

Yes, I amb tawking Abuot Brane Warshing!!!! Thare, Ive sayed It!! Wen sumb Thing it is durty,, yiu got to warsh it!!!!! and awl themb peple thaive Got durty Branes!!!!!! This here it is wye I warsh my Undies at leest oncet A Yeer!! Immajin haow turrable It wood “Be” iff yiu has a hedd-full of durty Undies!!!!! Whell “thats” waht its lyke ToBe MaGMA!!!! Thayr hedds Are Full “of” Darnold Trumpt’s duirty Undies!!!!!!

Freedum Of Speach it doz Not allouw yiu To say MAGMA things!!! Ownly rite Things!!!! That is waht Freedum it reely meens!!!!!

So comb On, Jo, get “on” the Stick!!! Rownd Up all themb MAgMa peple!!!!! and warsh thare Branes!!!!!!!!!! Oar elss yiu whill “be” heering fromb us!!!