Tag Archives: lee duigon blog

Byron: the Prize is Here!

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G’day, mates! Byron the Quokka here–and so is the prize for the human who posts Comment No. 50,000 on this blog.

Yep, it came in the mail this morning, so now you can be sure that one of you will win it. Here on Rottnest Island, us quokkas are getting up a pool to see who can pick the winner. I’m not allowed to tell you who I’m betting on, so don’t ask.

Any road, 50,000 comments is a big milestone and it’ll only come along once, so the prize has to be something special. Which it is!

Well, then, what is it? Ha! When we’ve got 49,000 views, that’s when I’ll tell you–and then watch everybody scramble to be No. 50,000. Crikey, we’re making history!


Huff-puff-puff, I Did It!

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Well, I’ve just cranked out and submitted my Newswithviews column for the week. Thanks to all of you who were pulling for me! But my head feels like it’s been used for a basketball.

The hardest part was shifting my focus from writing another chapter of The Wind From Heaven to writing about the inane goings-on in this shameful era of our history. Hint: the novel is a lot more fun.

So I contemplated the past few days’ blog posts and found two that seemed to go together very well: “Beyond Putrid” and the one about the Youth Climate Strike. Tune in Thursday to see how I did it.

And now I think I’ve earned the right to sit outside on this beautiful September day and do a crossword puzzle. Don’t worry–I’ve already done my bike ride.


Byron: Another Friendly Reminder

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G’day, mates! Byron the Quokka here–and why do I look so blinkin’ happy?

Well, all right, we quokkas are happy most of the time. But today we just found out that we’re able to offer that fantastic prize we talked about, to whoever wins the big comment contest and posts Comment No. 50,000.

Ah, but what is it? Sorry, but I’m not allowed to tell you that until we have 49,000 comments. Last I looked, we have 48,541. So if you want to see what the prize is… well, get chatting. And then watch those last thousand comments go up like crazy!

Tomorrow I’ll put up Question No. 15 of the Bell Mountain trivia contest–that’s 15 out of 20. Whoever wins that one gets an autographed book. We do have someone in the lead, but I’d rather not tell you who it is. You can have fun trying to guess!

And now I’m late for my How To Write A Great Novel lesson with Ms. Violet Crepuscular, so I’ll see you tomorrow.


Byron: ‘Where Is Everybody?’

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Oi! Where is everybody this morning?

Byron the Quokka here, mates–and I just stopped by to give you a friendly reminder, which is this.

The current ongoing comment contest is heading towards 50,000 comments on this blog, a major dinkum milestone, and there’ll be a special prize for the winner. We won’t tell you what the prize is until we’ve reached 49,000 comments–because we want to see the fur fly, once readers realize what a fantastic prize this is. We’re just a few hundred comments away from that.

Now I’m supposed to be running this thing, and it makes me look bad when there’s only one comment up so far today. A duck-billed platypus could do better than that!


Byron Presents: Bell Mountain Trivia Question No. 14

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G’day, mates! Byron the Quokka here: and Lee had to take the cat to the vet for her checkup, so he left me in charge. It’s a big responsibility!

But first things first: the Bell Mountain trivia contest, Question No. 14. Remember, I warned you the questions’d get harder as we moved toward No. 20. But first, No. 14:

Where did Barseen and Uncle Shesh come from?

Oh! And that SUV parked behind me–I’m trying to get Lee to make that the prize for winning this contest.

But he won’t listen to me unless he comes home and finds I got this blog a ton of views while he was out. Oi! Tell your friends about it! Let’s make this a blog day to remember–it’ll look great on my resume.


I’m Running for President!

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Move over, purple penguins! Now that some of the real lightweights have dropped out, it’s time for me to join the Democrat presidential nomination sweepstakes.

And here’s my first campaign promise, right up front. If I’m elected president, I guarantee that there will be no sharks swimming around in our department stores! No other candidate has made that promise because no other candidate can. With me in the White House, it will be perfectly safe to use the escalator in Barnes & Noble.

I also promise that the very least I would do, if you elect me president, would be… well, nothing. C’mon, now, people, which would be better? Joe Biden or Bernie Sanders or Kamala Harris–or a president who does, like, nothing? Fumbling, stupid, crazy policies, or no policies? Imagine a president with the good sense to leave the country alone. That would be me!

Now, you know they won’t let me take part in any of those “debates” they have. You saw how they all piled onto Marianne Williamson for coming out of political nowhere and still looking better than the rest of them. “I didn’t know they could be so mean!” she’s saying now. Hey, sister, I coulda toldja. “I didn’t know they lied so much!” Coulda toldja that, too.

So, then, help me build up my campaign war chest by buying my books. Books? What books? You have books? You’re darn tootin’ I do. Just go to this blog’s home page and click “Books,” and find out all about it. You can even order them from there.

Vote for me, Lee Duigon, in all your Democrat primaries!

Because doing nothing is better than doing evil.


We Did It–10,000 Views

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This illustration is here only because I love the Brachiosaurus–more of God’s stuff, don’t you know.

In case you missed the announcement last night, we made it to 10,000 views for the month of August–with 100 extra thrown in. The quokkas threw a party, then demanded that we get 10,000 for September, too.

Also my allergy attack has finally let up on me this morning–24 hours of misery, then it stops. That’s about the fifth time this summer.

Meanwhile, it’s a beautiful day, I’m going to enjoy my sabbath rest, gonna smoke a cigar… and then see what’s cooking with Oy, Rodney.


Ta-Dah! We Did It!

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Way to go, everybody! Ten thousand views for the month of August, with hours to spare.

This is only the fourth time we’ve hit the 10,000 mark: September 2018, February and May of this year, and now August. I wonder if we’ll ever get to the point where it happens all the time.

Now I have to go back to bed for a while–it’s another allergy weekend. See you tomorrow… with, I think, some more crepuscularity.


10,000 Views–Can We Make It?

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Even Byron the Quokka is excited about how close we are to getting ten thousand views for the month of August on this blog.

Only 87 left to go!

“Ought to be able to do that standing on your head!” says Byron.

Well, it’s been several decades since I last stood on my head, for the instruction of the little girl who lived next door to my aunts, who wanted to see how it was done. I don’t feel up to trying it again just now. Besides, my allergies are killing me again.

So, let’s see if those remaining 87 views come in. I’ll be sure to let you know.


Byron the Quokka Presents: Bell Mountain Trivia Question No. 13

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G’day, mates! Byron the Quokka here, with Bell Mountain trivia question No. 13–and here it is:

Who was said to be the toughest man in Obann City?

This character is so popular among us quokkas, my Aunt Sary named her firstborn son after him. That’s them in the picture.

Lee’s wife volunteered the answer, “Oh–that guy, you know who I mean!” Sorry, Pat, but that’s not good enough.

Remember, there are going to be 20 questions and whoever has the most right answers will win. We do have a leader at this point, but Lee won’t let me tell you who it is. Well, all right by me–we do want to keep the suspense pot boiling.

The winner gets an autographed copy of one of Lee’s books, plus the awe and respect of all the other readers of this blog.


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