Oh! It’s so hard to do God’s job for Him!
To help control the natural processes of the earth and make Climate Change stop, the Looniversity of London has banned hamburgers–and all other beef products, too (https://www.campusreform.org/?ID=13568). Because cow farts, dontcha know, make methane gas. We’re doomed.
Yes, the looniversity authorities have declared a “climate emergency,” and, like “pro-choice” big shots everywhere, they have erased another choice–the choice to eat a hamburger.
They’ll have to pry my White Castles from my cold, dead fingers.
Unbelief in God always seems to lead to out-of-control statism, as fallible human tyrants try to do God’s job–which they have to, of course, because He doesn’t exist. So now they’ve got to control the climate. Which they do by taking away your hamburgers. And anything else they think you shouldn’t have.
A prediction: Coming soon, to a campus near you–a ban on hamburgers.
All for your own good, as determined by The Smartest People In The World.
Fill in the blank and win a year’s supply of toothpaste sandwich cookies!
“I send my kids to public school to be ‘educated’ by far-out wackos because _______.”
A “teacher” at Denair Middle School, northern California, recently had to be stopped from handing out to his students a worksheet called “The Gender Unicorn,” which asks children about their “sexual preferences” and “sexual attractions” (https://sacramento.cbslocal.com/2019/08/09/school-leaders-stop-teacher-from-discussing-the-gender-unicorn/). Wow. Produced by “Trans Student Educational Resources.” The “teacher” instructs his seventh and eighth grade students to call him “Mx.”, not “Mr.”
Why do we have people like this teaching in our schools, on our dime? Why do we have no say at all in what we have to pay for?
The principal said she stopped the, er, “lessons” because the alleged teacher didn’t ask her permission before imposing them… and the parents didn’t like it.
Well, gee, folks! How many times do we have to tell you what’s going on in public schools? Don’t you believe us yet? I say “we” and “us” because it’s thousands of people telling the truth and no one’s listening.
At some point it will be too late to save our culture, no matter what we do.
So let’s not get to that point, shall we?
“Our mind is right, boss! Our mind is right!”
The California legislature has passed a resolution blaming “religious people”–the key words are “has caused”–for the high rate of suicides among homosexuals, lesbians, and other sexual aberrants (https://thefederalist.com/2019/06/27/ca-legislators-blame-religious-people-high-lgbt-suicide-rates/).
“The Legislature calls upon all Californians to embrace the individual and social benefits [?] of family and community acceptance” of those who practice the homosexual form of fornication. They do not tell us what those “benefits” are.
The reason this is only a resolution and not a law–yet!–is because the First Amendment to our Constitution prohibits any government from ordering the people’s religious beliefs. Without that protection, it’s a sure thing that these tinpot California fascists would be ordering all churches to “affirm” homosexuality as a positive good, and to erase all those sections of the Bible that do not affirm it. And there would be prison time for anyone who failed to obey.
The fact that it really is just about the easiest thing in the world to find a lamebrained liberal “affirming” church that affirms every sexual malpractice known to biology, cuts no ice with the legislature. It’s not enough for them that there are plenty of “gay-affirming” apostate churches. They won’t be satisfied unless all the churches are apostate.
And if they could literally dig their way into our brains and root out all the ideas they disapprove of, they’d do that, too.
Maybe Marty the Supermarket Robot could moonlight as a crimestopper.
If police were to arrest and jail you because some fortune-teller peered into a jar of Miracle Whip and announced that you were about to commit a crime, you would surely feel yourself ill-used.
But if a robot using “Artificial Intelligence” predicts it, well, that’s different (https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-7287341/AI-experts-release-statement-slamming-predictive-policing-digitizing-stop-frisk.html). It’s scientific!
See, they want to use “pre-crime algorithms” to know who’s gonna be bad so that they can bust him before he does it. Never mind the critics out there, most of whom are described as scientists, who call the whole thing “useless” and warn that it might lead to “mass incarceration” of people who haven’t yet committed the crimes they were jailed for.
The critics point to statistics that show that really very few people go out and commit a new crime while awaiting trial for an earlier offense. Another arrest–well, it looks bad. It might make it really hard to get bail. Judges don’t like to grant bail to persons who have just been busted for yet another crime. You can see their point.
Meanwhile, listen carefully… There is no such thing as “Artificial Intelligence.” There is only whatever human intelligence, or lack thereof, that goes into programming the computer. Algorithms are human creations–and therefore eminently fallible.
Would it help if they programmed the robot to say “I’m sorry”?
(Ooh, ooh, I know! Why not just lock up everybody! Robots could guard them and keep them from escaping. Good idea?)
U.S. Centaur–oops, sorry, that should be “Senator”–Kirsten Gillibrand, New York Democrat who wants to be president, says she’s got a $10 trillion plan to Save The Planet From Climbit Change (https://www.breitbart.com/politics/2019/07/25/kirsten-gillibrand-unveils-10-trillion-climate-change-plan/).
See, we gotta have “zero-carbon electricity in a decade” because Climbit Change is “the most serious threat to humanity today.” I thought the most serious threat to humanity today was white men. I know some other Democrat said that.
And the centerpiece of Gillibrand’s, er, plan is… wait for it… [trumpet fanfare] “enact the Green New Deal!”
Brilliant! Wipe out fossil fuels, the internal combustion engine (except for Important People’s limousines), air travel (except for Important People’s private jets), beef (except for Important People’s $10,000-a-plate banquets for Social Justice), and reduce the overall standard of living to that in which 12th-century Scottish peasants luxuriated.
If you’re even thinking about voting for a Democrat, any Democrat–get help now.
When you see fabulously wealthy politicians and celebrities yapping their heads off about “Income Inequality,” you have to wonder if they’re quite all there. I mean, they could always give you half their money, to make you equal to them.
But they’d always rather give away someone else’s money.
Here is an example from history of a nation that actually achieved income equality, if only for a little while.
I think they hit upon the only way to do it.
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He undrastands that This it “is” the ownly whay to fixx Amaricka!!!! YIU HAS GOT “TO” put Evry Singal Perssin Into COLLIDGE and iff thay woont “go” than yiu has got to “put themb” IN JALE!!!!! So afftir wee herd his Speach we hadded a Stodent Soviet meting and wee voted for Unaversle Free Collidge Be Compolsary ((that meens yiu Has “got” to go weather yiu Like It or knot!)) and aslo YIU CANT DO NOTHING ELSSE till afftir yiu “get” yore Deegree and aslo gradurate!!!
And thean somb Racist he sayed Whel “watt abuot whoo is goingto Do alll The “whirk” wile evry boddy thay Are alll In Collidge??”” Man watt a stopid and Hate Full dum and stopid thing to say!!! Like evry boddy knose Whirk It Blows! and it is jist a whay of Keeping The Peple Down!!!! So wee hadded to beet him Up “and” putt him “in” Sensortivvaty Traning!! Yiu doont has to whirk if yiu Are a Interllectural!!!!!!!!!!
And if evry boddy In The Contry thay “are” Alll Interllecturals then we Can has Pressadint O-Bomba back and aslo Hillery she can be Pressadint tooo and evry thing that is Rong it whil be fixxed and Thare “woont” be no moar Prombles!!! becose us Interllecturals we are Smart and evry Thing we doo it is smart!! and aslo wee wil putt alll Wite Peple in Jale tooo! Becose all the Prombles are thare fawlt!!!!
Jist thinck Of it!! Abstolotly Evry Singal Perssin in Amairika In Collidge!! Full Time!!! All studdyin for Deegrees “in” Gender Studies and Superhero Studes and aslo in Nothing Studies like Me!!!! I dont “know” wye we dint think “Of” this a thowsind yeers A’go!!!