‘But Is It Art?’ (2017)

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Remember this? A couple of students buy a pineapple at the supermarket and gull the art museum authorities into displaying it as a work of art.

But Is It Art?

Art has been in trouble for a very long time. Oh, you can still find gifted artists. But all the headlines seem to go to the crapola-meisters. And most of the money, too. I knew a high school art teacher whose art was positively gorgeous–and original, too. She was lucky to have the job she had. No way any of her work was going to make it into a museum.

*Sigh*

‘Curses, Foiled Again! No Sea Level Rise for New York, Washington D.C.’ (2016)

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All those dramatic predictions! All that rending of garments and gnashing of teeth! Sea levels gonna rise, rise, rise! And New York and Washington will wind up underwater. The new Atlantis!

Curses, Foiled Again! No Sea Level Rise for New York, Washington D.C.

Imagine their dismay when the sea levels there actually went down a bit.

None of this has ever been anything but a grab for power and wealth at the general population’s expense. “Give us all yo’ money! Give us all the power! Only then can we save you from Climbit Chains!” (“Don’t you wretched peasants listen to the Settled Science???”)

One wonders just how sad the rest of America would be if New York and Washington went under water.

Oh…. Fap!

43,749 Heavy Rain Photos - Free & Royalty-Free Stock Photos from Dreamstime

This day just ain’t going my way.

I did get caught in the rain, big-time. Every time I start to read Rodney Stark’s book, I get rained on. Trying to salvage my cigar break, I stowed the book in the foyer and broke out the umbrella. It wasn’t quite equal to the challenge.

Then we had to make an extra trip to Whole Foods because they failed to deliver what we ordered.

Maybe I should just give it a rest till after suppertime. I’m wet. I’m tired. Can’t think how to improve today’s viewer numbers.

See you later for a cat video.

I Can’t Get Into Gear!

The Lizard Lab on Twitter: "Hot off the press! Our new paper on  anti-predator behaviour in newly hatched Australian water dragons.  @JamesBG_27 scared a lot of baby lizards! https://t.co/ZwRA1IJDOS e-mail us  for

There’s too much to do!

After going on a passel of errands this morning, I find myself stymied. What to write about? Can’t get the new book started: thunder has been rumbling, can’t sit outside and write. And as for nooze…

Fap.

Yo, folks, what should I write about today? I mean, that everybody else isn’t already writing about. I think I’ll try to have a cigar and read some of Rodney Stark’s book before it starts to rain. That’ll give you some time to offer suggestions. I need some helpful hints for getting my viewership back up to speed.

Stay Tuned!

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I have to go to the store now, but stay tuned for some huuuuge big nooze a little later!

Joe Collidge will check in, but there’s bigger nooze than that–

–Has the Pregnant Man returned already? He hasn’t been defenestrated?

My bloodwork is in, by the way: looks like I’m good for another year. I did have COVID, though: but we thought so. Now I have natural antibodies. Ditto Patty. But we think it was COVID that carried off our little Peep.

Gotta go before it starts raining…

The $%#@ing Toilet Broke!

Kohler Toilet Flush Handle Replacement, Fits Side Mount Toilet Tank Lever,  Chrome Polished - - Amazon.com

It’s just about bed-time, I’m watching a little YouTube video, when Robbie starts yowling for some more food and Patty wakes up and starts, um, exhorting me to do that–which means I have to clear away some dirty dishes first, and the cat follows me and carries on like she’s on the very brink of starving to death.

No sooner do I get the dishes into the sink when I am subjected to an urgent call of nature which I dare not ignore, despite the protests that ensue when I rush upstairs to the bathroom.

Finished. I flush the toilet. The handle breaks. Yes, it’s 11:30 at night and the fatzing toilet breaks. This leads to a heart-felt soliloquy.

Now it’s the next morning, and by the light of day I see that I can easily fix this myself if I can only get the parts. Voila, we order them online. Meanwhile, to flush the toilet, we have to remove the top, reach inside, and pull the chain that lifts the flapper.

It’s those little irritations in life that drive you freakin’ crazy.

A Blogger’s Day

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I’ve done my weekly Newswithviews column, don’t ask me how, I’ve put up what were intended to be really interesting blog posts, and have been trying to forget the latest sales figures for my books.

Viewer traffic here has gone way down this month. It’s like working at CNN. I don’t know why. Some of you are Christian bloggers–has this been happening to you, too?

Maybe what I need is some posts by really hot guests. Celebrities! Yeah, that might do it. I emailed a big one last week, but he hasn’t answered me. How big? Well, put it this way: if Oprah Winfrey asked me for a guest spot, she’d have to stand in line behind this celebrity. That goes for Joey Bishop, too.

Let’s go check the email again…

Blood Work (What Will They Find?)

Yale Peabody Museum on Twitter: "It's Thursday. Let's celebrate.  Podokesaurus is the new state #dinosaur of Massachusetts! #DailyDetail  #AgeofReptilesMural https://t.co/F63TaWOCLM" / Twitter

Enjoy this nice picture of a Podokesaurus.

All right, I’m back from having blood work done at a diagnostics lab. Results will be ready in two days: find out what kind of frightful diseases are lurking in my bloodstream, working for the Grim Reaper.

Nice people at the lab, though. (It’s the nice ones who get you. Your guard is down, y’see…)

Well, let’s get to work and see if we can generate some views today.

Tomorrow’s Nooze Today

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I have to go back to the doctor tomorrow morning for blood work, find out what kind of nasties are secretly at work in my innards, so I’m going to lose a bit of blogging time.

Here are two stories I want to write up tomorrow, if I can.

*Conservatives win 10 out of 11 school board elections in Tarrant County, Texas (where Fort Worth is). The only one who didn’t win has qualified for a run-off.

*Nooze media and Democrat politicians insist that California’s new abortion bill, if passed (of course it’ll pass, it’s California) do not make it okay to kill newborn babies. Actually it’s nowhere near as clear-cut as all that.

Also, I’ve got the sales figures for my books. The less said about that, the better. They are not nice figures.

Tune in tomorrow for more complete coverage.

Happy Birthday… to Me

Quokka Birthday Party - Hello Perth

G’day–I think! What a time I had, pasting a picture to go with this post. Byron the Quokka here, with birthday wishes to the aging mackerel who writes this blog.

No, I won’t tell you how old he is. And anyway, you’re only as old as you feel. Give this guy a wiffle-ball and he’s eleven years old again.

We don’t have a party put together yet (is it too late to try?), but I suppose a truckload of views would make the blighter happy.

That and some nice crunchy green leaves.