We ‘Give’ Thancks to Pressadint Obomma!!!

1,720 Pumpkin Statue Images, Stock Photos, 3D objects, & Vectors |  Shutterstock

We hadded a toatilly Un-Nessasairy contrav (I doughnt know haow “to” spel the Rest) hear at Collidge becose sumb Hater thay spyed “On” our Stodint Soviet Thancks-givving!!!

We awl “got” togither to Givv thancks and prey to Pressadint Obomma,, we hoalded Hands “and” dantsed Aruoung his Stachoo!. Mayby yiu ree-memmber a wile Ago the Hedd it fell Off “the” stachoo and we cuddnt gloo It “back” On so we putted A Punkin thare in-stedd, like yiu Can “sea” in the Pixture!!

Awlso we want to has a stachoo of Pressadint Jobydin “so” we can warship himb Too butt we are Out “Of” punkins but mayby we can Use “a” Graipfroot for his Hedd. Sumb boddy thay whil has to “draw a Faice” on itt!!!!!

The Funniest ‘Joe Collidge’ Ever

I Wanted to Be Superman. I Failed. | Psychology Today Ireland

I happened to encounter this post yesterday. Was that the one with all the funny comments? Yes, it was–“Souper Man He Is Woke!!!” And not to blow my own horn, but it gave me a laugh and I think it’ll do the same for you.

Souper Man he Is Woke!!!!

Really, I’m so tired of superheroes! And movies based on comic books. It tires me out just to know there are people “studying” this **** in college, and paying wheelbarrows full of money for the privilege.

‘Can You Say “Boiling-Over Hypocrisy”?’ (2019)

Standing in front of the colonnade of Columbia University's Butler Library, students hold up handwritten signs on cardboard to show support for the Palestinian cause.

But none of this “Death to you-know-who” stuff is Hate Speech, huh?

By now we have thousands of examples of this. College is where your soul goes to die. And your brain, too.

This, for instance, from the University of Illinois:

Can You Say ‘Boiling-Over Hypocrisy’?

When you unpack this drivel all you find is shin-kicking Stalinism.

And now, four years later–ta-dah! Look at those looniversities turning out to support Hamas! That’s what you bought for your education dollars, America.

We’re not kidding: no more public money for the colleges.

Collidge It ‘Is’ Nott “In’ Trubble!!!!!

What happened at Minneapolis' 3rd Precinct — and what it means | 'The  precinct is on fire' | APM Reports

Enrolemint down?? Hah!!! Then waddaya caul This???

We keeep heering “that” Hyer Eddication “it is” in Deep Doo-Doo and it is goingto Fale and Go Broak and no boddy thay whil Be Smart enny moar!!!!!! What a big fat lye!!!!!!

Now thayr Tell”ing” us enrolemint It Is down-down-Down!!! That its Down by oavur A Millyin stodents!!!! since 2020 but that “was” a badd yeer and evin Pressadint Jobydin he cuddnt “Saive” it!!!!

Well thats jist Krazy!!!!!!! Look at waht weeve “got!”!” Ginder Studdies!!! Nothing Studdies!! Trans Studdies!!!! Evry “kyned” Of Studdy yiu can thinck Of!!! And tuns and tuns of Stoodints all oavur The plaice!!!!!! (I seen themb!!!)

But nevvir myned!!!!! Heer “at” The Stodint Soviet, we has thunk up a Sollucion!!!

GOVVERMINT IT MUST ACKT!!!!!!!! Govvermint shood maik A Man Date!!!!

No maor foooling arownd!! Collidge it Must Be maid Cumplossary!!! No moar stayin hoam!!!! Evvry parson In Amairca thay “Must!!!” Go To Collidge and “stay thare” till thay get “a” Deegree!!!!!! Becose Eddacasion it “Is” Our Moast Impotent Produck!!!!!!! And this whay Thare wil has to Be “Moar Collidge” not Lest!!!!!!!

Of coarse iff Evvry Boddy thay “go to” collidge thenn The cuountry it whil knead Moar Collidges, moar prefessers, More bill dings, moar Pentions, and a lott Of us we whil Becumb prefessers and Nott jist Stoodints enny moar!!!!

I amb reddy to Teech!!!!!!

Hillery She Does It!!!

Democratic Presidential candidate Hillary Clinton participates in a campaign rally, November 1, 2016 in Dade City, FL.

Hillery she “is” The gratist!!!!

Weigh to go Hillery!!! Oman, she hased Hit “the” bollseye!!!!

She was “on” TV and she sayed,, And I kwote= “Thare kneads To-be a fourmel Dee-progamping “of” the Kult Membres”!”!”

Waht Kult is that?? MAGMa! Thatss waht!!! Awl them Racist Biggit doaps whoo “sapport” Darnold trumpt!!!!!!! The fedrule Guvvermint shood aughht To rownd “themb” up And dee-pogrom themb!!!! Becose “it is” agginst The Law to has Exstreamist Idears “and” thawts!!!!!!!!!

And aslo I been whaching “this” heer Viddio abuot Nanderthawl cavemen and “It” looks like MAGMA got themb tooo!!!!!!

Hillery she KNOWS awl theeze Racist Crazy Nuts thay taik thare odors dywreckly fromb Darnold Trumpt and thay “are Try-ing” to deestroy Our Dummocratsy!!!!! Thare branes thay shood Bee taikin Out “and” warshed!!! Oah she wood has maid A Grate Pressadint, eevin as Grate “as” Pressadint Obommer!!!Jobydin he shood Retyre and she whil taik “his Plaice” and lock Up awl thoze MAGmA peple!!!!!!

‘Even More Incredible: “Have Sex With the Earth”‘ (2017)

Beistle Propeller Beanie (1/Pkg), or buy in bulk.

Fill in the blank with something that makes sense and win a hat with a propeller on it!

“I spend tens of thousands of dollars to send my child to this lackwit factory because _______.”

Even More Incredible: ‘Have Sex with the Earth’

What can you say about having certifiable wack-jobs “educate” your children? In what way, shape, or form is any of this “higher” education? Or any kind of education at all? Oh, God, the money that is wasted! The labor!

How much longer is our country going to last?

No Moar Rong Idears Aloud!!!!!!

Sweat box | ODDCITY

Thats “it,,” its Tyme our Collidge we got tuff on Rong Idears!!! We heered abuot it in the news and nhow we Know “waht” To Do (https://campusreform.org/article?id=23824)!!

We helded “a” meating Of “the” Stoodint Soviet and we voated U-nanimosityly to Punnish Rong Idears and nott Alouw enny-boddy “to” Has them enny-moar!!!

We seen this heer Moovie, “”Kool-Aid Luke,” and thay has this Suet Box and “iff yiu” brake the rools yiu gots to Be “in The” Suet Box for howers And howers until Yore Mynd Is Rite!!!!!! I thinck Thare “is” a Kitt that yiu “can Senned” awhay foar, witch we kneed becose our Collidge it doughnt has a Suet Box!!!! But it duz nhow!!!!!!!

So fromb nhow “on” yiu Cant “say” hatful Things like “”A “man” Is Not a wimmin!”!”! That whil laand yiu In “the” Suet Box untill yore Myned is rite!!!! And yiu Cant thinck themb ether!!!

Immadjin a Hole countree ware thare Issnt No-Boddy who gots A Rong Idear!!

Meenwile we wil kneed “a” lot Moar Suet Boxes!!!!!!!!!!

My Newswithviews Column, Aug. 3 (‘Survey Results “Shock” the State of Oregon’)

Hospitalization after fainting can do more harm than good - Harvard Health

“Somebody help! She read the survey results!”

How can it be? How can anyone NOT be totally enamored of all things gender-fluid? It can only be because they’re fascists!

Survey Results ‘Shock’ The State Of Oregon

Survey doofuses at Oregon State University are wetting their diapers over results of a survey of engineering and computer science students. Out of 349 kids surveyed, 50 returned “mocking responses.”

And that’s just the 50 students who had the guts to tell the surveyors where to get off. Who knows how many felt the same but didn’t think it worthwhile to say so?

It’d be funny if “college” wasn’t as successful as they thought at churning out brainless Far Left zombies.

‘Cheat Your Way Into College!’ (2019)

See the source image

I wonder what his major is.

They’ve raised the tuition out of sight. But Everybody (!) has to go to college! So how do you do that when they say your family’s too (heh-heh) “wealthy” to qualify for financial aid, but certainly not “wealthy” enough to eat the cost themselves?

When in doubt, cheat!

Cheat Your Way into College!

Slick! Transfer guardianship to a cousin who’s not well off–you can pay him under the table–and Junior can pursue a degree in Cisichthyological Gender Studies. Problem solved!

 

 

Gallup Poll Looks Bad for ‘Higher Education’

Every year, many, many stupid people graduate from college. And if they can  do it, so can you.

Who would’ve thought it? Public confidence in America’s colleges and universities has “drastically declined,” according to a recent Gallup Poll (https://campusreform.org/article?id=23609).

Say it ain’t so, Joe!

In 2015, public confidence in “higher education” was 57%. In 2018, 48%. And now it’s down to 36%. Ulp.

Despite the fact that Job One for higher education is to crank out useful idiots who will vote for Democrats (providing they can remember to vote), confidence among Democrats slid from 68% to 59%. Ouch. And among Republicans, it’s only 19%.

Given the costs and prestige of college, these are startling figures.

Joe Collidge, hiding from skin-walkers, was unavailable for comment. But he has been known to attribute the trend to White Supremacy and Systemic Racism. It’s also Donald Trump’s fault. “And aslo awl themb stopid peple Out Thare,, thay Are jist Jellice!!!!!” His solution is to label any criticism of higher education “hat speach.”