Daunted Dogs

You wonder what scares dogs. A big stuffed toy. A shadow. Just about anything, really.

But I noted that there weren’t any really little dogs in these videos. I don’t think the little ones scare so easily. Why do you suppose that is?

Let Your Pets Do Your Laundry

We know about cats and dogs–just try to keep them out of the laundry. But here we also have a piglet, a raccoon… and a monitor lizard who has a thing for towels. Be warned: the piglet steals the show.

It is said that the great Tunisian poet, Ike Flannagan, had a pet seal that also did his ironing for him. But who can believe a thing like that?

Incredible Bombshell Game-Changer! Kitten & Hedgehog

Sorry! Got carried away with the headline. It wound up sounding like a lot of the hundreds of emails I get every day.

I expect the kitten and the hedgehog will eventually become friends–but not while the kitten’s still unsure whether the hedgehog is real or not. Who can blame him? There are a lot of fake hedgehogs around, these days.

Cats & Treadmills: A Love Story

Most people don’t know that the treadmill was invented in the 19th century as a means of punishment, and was used in prisons until a judge ruled it cruel and unusual.

But here are cats finding all sorts of inventive ways to use a treadmill, all of them much more fun than anything a human might do with it.

That is probably why they don’t sentence cats to prison.

Conversations with Your Cat

Do you talk to your cat? Does he talk back?

I’m convinced cats understand a lot of what you say to them. I think of our cat, Henry, arguing with me back and forth over possession of the pieces in my Strat-O-Matic Baseball game. He objected vigorously to my not letting him have the little plastic baserunners.

And I once said to Buster, while he was perched on a cabinet and looking out the window, “Y’know, your sister’s put on too much weight. Why don’t you chase her up the stairs?” And that’s exactly what he did.

I rest my case.

Cats & Christmas Trees (A Horror Movie)

The only time our Christmas tree fell over, the cats had nothing to do with it. It just fell. And landed on me.

We have a real tree, and it takes me a good two hours to decorate it. I am happy to say none of our cats ever brought down a Christmas tree. Eating pine needles, batting low-hanging ornaments around, rumpling the blanket–that’s about all the mischief we have to cope with.

Yeah, we can laugh at these videos. You sort of have to.

The Possum’s Girlfriend

Here is a possum who’s just plain crazy about this girl. Who knew they could be so affectionate? Did somebody say opossums are primitive mammals, left over from the Age of the Dinosaurs? Fap! to that. A dog will make this kind of fuss over someone, but no dinosaur ever did.

Or maybe it’s just her hair…

P.S.–My wife had a pet possum years ago, a female with babies, and has fond memories of it.

I brought a baby possum up to my room when I was a boy, but my mother freaked out when she saw it.

Norbert’s War with the Sheets

A pox on all those fake “conservatives” who turn into surrender monkeys the moment the going gets rough. Fap! to them all.

I need a dose of Norbert. Maybe you do, too. So here he is grappling with recalcitrant sheets in what Violet Crepuscular would surely call “a subcutaneous moment.”

This Cat’s a Genius

I’ve heard of cats learning to use the toilet; but this is the first time I’ve ever seen one flush it. And he flushed it when the human asked him to! Otherwise he would’ve let it slide.

Now I wonder if cats ever wonder if human beings can learn to use a litter box.

Rats Are Nicer than You Think

Our pet rats were affectionate, playful, cuddly, and just about as smart as animals can be without going to law school.

If you have more than one rat, they will compete for your affection: they pretty much have to have it. You can teach them to do all sorts of tricks, not counting the ones they teach themselves.

I’ve seen people who shuddered at rats wind up, 15 minutes later, petting them and doing cozy-talk. They can have that effect on you.