No Moar “‘Troo Or Fawlse'”” Qwizzes!!!!

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I doughnt knoiw haow This here jobb it taked So “long” to do!!!! Finely affter “awl theez yeers” we who “Are” “the” Stodent Soviet we gotted “the” Collidge to abrollish Troo-Fawlse qwizzes!!!!!

Theez hear thay Whir stopid qwizzes!!!!!!!!!! Like waht cood “be” stopider thann saying Somb thing it “is” Troo wen it izznt Troo foar Evry Boddy??? And iff yiu “szay” Somb thing “it” “Is” Fawlse thenn That is Trigguring and foar Shure a Micro Grecian!!!!

Frinstints!! Hear is A Stopid Troo Oar Fawlse qwesschin!! “”Jumboe Shrimps thay Are “not” reely Ellerfints”!”! It is Racist!! And waht abuot Shrimps that “are” Trans-Isshinning into Ellerfints?? To Say Somb thing it “is” Troo oar Fawlse it “is” ownly a fourm “Of” Wite Stuprembassy!!!!

The Trooth is “that” Nothhing is Troo and notthing is Fawlse unlest yiu “say” it “is”!”!” Thare is no sutch Thing as fackeds and that Is A Facked!!!!! And waht abuote stuph That is “Troo” ownly wen it is Fawlse???? Haha i reely gotted yiu “thare”!! Yiu cannt anster That One caan yiu????

This hear it “is” waht Us Interllecturals we Do besst!!!!!!

We Got Equetty!!!!

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We has strick a Bloe “for” Equetty and Socile Jutstus and Dyvercitty in Helth Cair hear “at” collidge!!!! We got ridd “of” all the Wite dockters and nourses!!!!! and we Are “goingto” re-plaice themb rite aweiay!!!!!!

Now we doughnt has no “dockter skool”” at our collidge so we hadded To re-plaice all themb Racist dockters “and” nourses whith Gender Studdies stoodints witch “is” jist as good as themb reggalur dockters if Not beter!!!!!!! Iff yiu “get” sick thay whil ficks yiu up In no tyme!!!!

And aslo In Eddision “to That” we has aslo fowned “the” Ideel parson to putt “in” Chardge “of” awl The Helth Cair at our collidge!!!! She useded “to-be” a Made in Nantsy Pullocie’s howse, How grate Is that??? Thay say she Eeven knows somb Voo-Doo!!!!! It jist gose to Showe yiu yiu awlyaws Come Out ahhed wen yiu has a Mynaritty rhunning “The” shoow!!!!!!

And yiu know waht?? I all-reddy pheel beter!

Nhow I Seene ‘The’ Lihght!!!!

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What a lexture we hadded Yeasteday!!!! The prefesser “he” sayed,, Iff yiu “lurn Nothin elce fromb” this heer Collidge “yiu shood awt “to” Lurn this!! Lurn this!!! alll staytmints thay Are Falce!”!”!”

Nhow i Undder-stand!!!!! Nhow i Get Itt!!!!!! Nhow it awl maikes cents!!!!!!! Every Thing “that” evry Boddy says,, “it is” Awl Lyes!!!! Exsept wen it “is” Socile Juststus! And aslo wen-evver Pressadint Obomma or Hillery or Jobydin thay says it–*=be cawse Even if Thay “are” Lyieing it “is” jist the saim As Trooth!”!”!! So yiu has To beleave themb Or Elce!!!!!

Somb Hater Biggit he sayed “Iff Evry Thing it is “a” Lie then Howcum Socile Jutstus it “Is” knot A lie Tooo???”? Butt fyve (5!) of us we beet himb Up!!!! Do yiu sea How thay Twissed evvry Thing?!

Ennyhow iff Evvry Thing is “is” “a” Lie then we doughnt has to Lissen “to” no-boddy, like Nevver!!!! And “that” is goood be cose moast Of “us’ we Hait Lissining!!!!!!!

 

We Nead Spaice Hemlets!!!!!

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One of Our prefessers “he” whent Crazie and “it” was Very Skary!!!! Do yiu know waht he doned??

He stratted Yelling “at” us and saying we “are” Tryying to Kill himb!!! he sayed we were “giving” himb COVID!!!! Becawse themb Massks thay doughnt Whork “and” Socile Ditzensing it doughnt Whork neether “”And Yiu “are” shooting Jermbs at me awl Day!!!”!” He was So mad,, he starrtid Cussing and wen that diddnt Whork he Smacked sevrul stoodints, he hitted themb “rihght” in the Haid!!!!!!!!!! Heed of did moar,, ownly the Kampus Kops caim and tooked himb “awaighy.”

Ah! Butt he “is” awl-rihght nhow!!! and we has awl lurnt a Lessen!!!

He comed Back thist Affternune and he “was So” hapy!! Becose nhow he hased a Spaice Helmlet on his haid and the Jermbs “thay caint” Get himb!!!!! That is himb in the pixture up Thare!!

So we “are” “gongto” demanned that the Collidge pro-vyde Spaice Hemlets for evry boddy (axept Chrischins!!) to maik “It” Unposibble foar “enny” Jermbs to Get at us!!!!!

We can aslo Use the Hemlets for becumbing Asstronuts!!!

We Whant A No-Day Work Weak!!!

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We herd “the” Congreasial Progestive Carcas thay “are” Tryying To maik a 4-D’ay Work Weak insted “Of” 5 and this heer It “Is” “A” Stepp In The Rihght Durecsion!!!! So we caled a Merjintsy Meting of our Stoodint Soviet to send themb A Leter!!!!!

We wroted “Deer Progrestive Corcus we “are” Thralled by the Hole Idear of geting Ridd of Work becuaose lets Faise it,, Work It Blows!!!! Wye shood enny boddy has to Work?? Axept Crischins who are no-good Haters!!! “We” whant yiu To Go Ahed and get ridd “Of” awll 5 dayze!!!””!” That weay Evry Boddy “thay” can awl be In Collidge lyke us (axept Crischins, thay are Racists!)! If yiu maik Free Tooission then evry boddy thay “can” Go and fromb nhaow on “do” nothing Butt Studdy!!!!!” And aslo play Lots of Grate Viddio games!!!!!!! A”nd Cumpyouters and aslo Racists thay can D”o” Alll the work!!!”” In facked,, Evry Boddy thay “Can” staye In Collidge foar thare Hole Lifes!!!!! How grate is that?????

Jist think!! No maor Work, evver!!! The Hole Countree it can jist be “one” gient Collidge!!!!!!! Evry Thing it whil “bea” pade foar By “The” Guvvermint!!!!!!!!!! No Boddy wil eeven has “To” get Owt of Bedd in “the” moaning!!! Axep themb crischins!!

We whant yiu to Know “that” alll us Intrallecturals we “Are” whidth yiu All The Whay on this!@!!!!!!!!!

Haow To Get Reely Inkloosieve!!!!

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Oman, watt a lexture we hadded In Nothing Studies “this” moaning!!!! This tyme we Reely lernt “somb-Thing!”!”

Our prefesser she teeched us That A Mairaca it cant “Be” trooly Inkloosieve unlest “we” stop hasing Naimes!!!!! Becuase Naimes thay “Are” nott Inkloosieve at all in facked thay are Ex-Kloosieve!!!! and the ownlie Thing to doo “abuote” It is foar Evry Boddy to get ridd “of” thare Naimes!!!!!! and fromb naow On No Boddy whill has Naimes it whill awl “be” jist “Hay Yiu” oar somb-Thing lyke “that!!””

This heer it is Somb-thing foar “The” Guvvermin to gett “to whork” On rite aweaigh!!! So we sended a leter To the Pressadint Jobydin!!! Deer Pressadint yore Hynist Jobydin,, “we wood lyke “yiu” to maik A Man Date to get ridd of Evry Boddy’s name (Axcept yores and Hillery’s of coarse!!!!) so that A Mairica it whillbe trooly “Inkloosieve”!”!”! And we awl sined it!!!!

Axcept then we reelized “that” we jist putt awl Our “Naimes” on a patishin to a-bollix awl Naimes!!!! So we hadded “to” cross owt Alll themb Naimes and just put Xes thare insted!!!!!

Now we “are” wating for himb “to doo” a Man Date,, i hoap “He” is nott tooo bizzy!!!!

You Can’t Call Children “Children” Anymore?

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Leftid morons are playing havoc with our language. Well, of course: they don’t want us able to communicate with one another.

Some college pinhead yesterday said we shouldn’t call children “children” anymore, it’s something-ist, we should call them “little people.” I thought that meant leprechauns. Or have dwarfs claimed that label for themselves?

And of course we’re not supposed to say “boys and girls” anymore because that is definitely Trans-Phobic and Binary and will make hair grow on your palms. Reality is just so IST!

This is what we’re getting for our “higher education” dollars.

Is it worth it, do you think?

‘Bill Maher: We Need to Promote Death’ (2018)

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Just wind him up and he chatters inanely.

Again we find confirmation of Proverbs 8:36, [A]ll they that hate me love death.” That would include alleged comedian Bill Maher.

Bill Maher: ‘We Need to Promote Death’

The thing with these people is, you can never quite decide what to make of them. Do they say these jejune things because they really believe them, or are they just trying to sound clever? (A lot of us outgrow that, once we’re out of high school.)

The line between “intellectual” and not-so-funny comedian is indeed a very thin one.

Guvermint Thay Wil Maik Me Ritch!!!!!

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I jist fowned Out that the guvvermint thay whil Pay “yiu” a Milyin Dolors or sumbthing for crosing “the” Boarder!!!!! So sumb of us hear “At” Collidge we whil go daown thare and Cros “the” Boarder!!!!! and then we whil Be ritch!!!!!! heck it shoodnit be tooo Hard “to” Sneek into Mecksaco!!!!!!!!!

But frist it is Hallaweeen to-morroh and i got “to Gett” “a” Cosstomb so i can “go” Trick Oar Treeting!!!!! Sumb idjit thay seen my Moth Antenners “and” sayed “Yiu awlreddy got a Cosstomb” and that maid me Pheel Bad so i hadded “to go To” the Saif Spaice for a wile and do Play-Doh!!

I has de-sided to putt my Hed incide “a” Punkin and pree-tenned to be a Jacko Lantrin!!!! That whay no boddy thay whil “see My” Antenners!!! Then I whil get Candy!!!!! Ownly wen I whent Lassed Yeer somb Laydy “she” gived me theese heer Toooth Payst cookys,,, and thay maid Me Sick!!!!!

Sumb-day i wood lyke “to” has “a” Cittazin Of The Whirld Cosstomb and “get” A jobb in “the” Guvvermint!!!!

Mr. Spock He ‘Is’ Reel!!!!

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We hadded a fastenating lexture Lassed Nihght it was awl abuot how Starr Treck thay are awll Reel!!! but Donold Trumpt he maided peple “thinck” thay wasnt reel jist so’s “he” cood maik people Not be Hapy!!!!!

I bet yiu has heered that Mr. Spock “he” “Was” reely somb ackter naimed Lennerd Kneemoy,, whatt “A” big fatt Lye!!!!!!!! I bet you heered thay wasnt reel Poynty Eers on himb!!!! The thing Is,, themb Repubickins thay doughnt “wahhnt” no boddy to bee Hapy axsep themb!!!!!!!!!!

Our lexture gye he wood knot Give “his Naim” becose then Racists thay wood Ass-ass-onate himb!!!! But he sayed Starr Treck “it” Is “alll” Reel and thare reely is Starr Schips and Cling-ons and Skotty and Captin Kurk whoo hased bin Pretending he “is” a Ackter naimed Wilbum Shattner!!! Thay “Are” alll Up Thare flyin Arowned but the guvvermint thay whil Killl yiu becuase It “is awl” Topps Seckrit!!!!!!!

The lexture gye he sayed I know “Starr” Treck” “it is reel!! Becose I SEEN Mr. SPOCK and hee done The Vulkin Mined Melled on me to re-stoar My Sannaty!!!””” Witch like toatully Prooves it!!!!!