Bunny Gourmet

You may like a little squeeze of lemon in your tea, or on your salad, or your French fries; but to chew and eat a slice of lemon, that might exceed your pucker factor.

But what about a bunny? Would a bunny enjoy eating a lemon? Let’s see what this bunny does with his first lemon slice.

Fake! Fake! Fake!–ABC ‘News’

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No one got slaughtered and it wasn’t in Syria: other than that, fine.

Ooh! “Slaughter in Syria”! And all Donald Trump’s fault, too!

Only it turns out that the “Slaughter in Syria” video shown–twice!–by ABC News was, in reality, video from a 2017 nighttime demonstration at a shooting range in Kentucky (https://nationalpost.com/news/world/abc-news-mistakes-footage-from-a-kentucky-gun-range-as-turkish-militant-attack-on-syria).

ABC “News” aired the video twice, once on “World News Tonight” (Sunday) and again on “Good Morning, America” (Monday). After it was proved that the video came from Kentucky–and two years ago, at that–ABC Nooze apologized for the “mistake” (heh-heh) and deleted the video from both shows.

They got caught.

This is what happens when what they laughingly call “the narrative” replaces honest reporting of real events. “The narrative” called for President Trump to have heartlessly deserted our faithful Kurdish allies, blah-blah, allowed them to be massacred by Turkey, etc., etc. For “the narrative” read “yet another Democrat lie.” Because the nooze industry is nothing, anymore, but a shill for the Democrat Party.

And then the nooze media actually wonder why more and more Americans are coming to despise them? They actually wonder why we don’t trust them anymore?

They’re gonna lie themselves right out of business, and we won’t miss them.

When We Were All Little Sages

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Sometimes what you knew turned out to be not true.

All this bowing down to children and asking them to please tell us what our public policies should be, reminds me of how wise we all were when I was in fifth grade.

Out on the playground, which was our grove of Academe, we liked to discuss weighty topics with one another: the more philosophically abstruse, the better. We especially liked scientific subjects.

One of the topics we discussed at great length went like this: “Ya know, every time they talk about shooting a rocket to the moon, these two dubular clouds appear on Mars…”

Dubular? What does that mean? Well, nobody asked! Each of us took it for granted that everybody else knew exactly what it meant. I didn’t know, but that didn’t stop me from repeating that baloney. It got so I didn’t have to know what it meant! Just saying it made us sound so wise.

If only adults had listened to us, back then! Obviously they had no appreciation for our childly wisdom.

But that seems to be changing fast.

Keep your eyes peeled for dubular clouds on Mars.

By Request, ‘As the Deer’

As the hart panteth after the water brooks, so panteth my soul after thee, O God. (KJV)

Requested by Erlene, As the Deer Panteth for the Water–and I have no idea who’s singing it, but it’s quite beautiful. Inspired by Psalm 42:1 (see above).

A Judo Peeve

From time to time I like to look at videos of judo techniques, to see how much I remember. Although my first judo lessons were self-taught, out of a book (my throws weren’t perfect, but they did work), later I had instructors trained in the Kodokan–Japan’s premiere judo academy. These were the best teachers you could get, outside of the Kodokan itself.

The video above demonstrates a hip throw called hane-goshi. And I don’t know about now, but back in the 1960s my Kodokan instructors would have laughed themselves silly over this.

Because, when the supposed master goes to perform the throw, he goes into a windup that would telegraph the throw from a mile away; and any opponent with his wits about him, by a simple flick of the wrist, would have this guy face-down on the canvas before you could say “sayonara baka.”

I mean, really, took at that: just before he rushes in for the throw, just after he’s taken a long step backward to let the opponent know it’s coming, he is totally off-balance, and if he weren’t hanging onto the other guy, he’d fall down without anyone having to push or pull him down.

I know, I know–most of you aren’t into judo, why should you care if they don’t teach it correctly anymore?

Because judo is only one thing that isn’t taught correctly anymore; and most of those things are a lot more important than judo.

‘Bell Mountain’… and Mars

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Remarking that for some reason my character, Tughrul Lomak (one of King Ryons’ chieftains), reminds her of Tars Tarkas in Edgar Rice Burroughs’ Martian novels, Heidi has asked to what extent, if any, those books by ERB have influenced my Bell Mountain books.

Tars Tarkas is a green Martian, a member of a race that has brutalized itself by practicing communalism–especially the communal raising of children: these guys take “It takes a village” to its logical extreme. But he has broken the law by loving his own daughter, which has made him capable of sympathy, friendship, and self-sacrifice. But he’s one of my favorite characters in the series, so thanks, Heidi, for mentioning him. Good old Tars Tarkas!

As to your question: Edgar Rice Burroughs has been one of my favorite authors since I first opened a paperback copy of Pellucidar back in high school. Over time, the Mars novels have become my favorite Burroughs stories. It’d be very unusual if I weren’t influenced by them.

But I’m old enough now to have learned not to try to imitate other writers, except in very general ways.

From Edgar Rice Burroughs I’ve learned everything I know about juggling sub-plots without dropping any, pacing, and moving the story continually forward, not letting it bog down anywhere along the way. No one ever did those things better than ERB.

Another thing I’ve learned from his example is that when the imagination wants to rip, let her rip! This is especially evident in one of my all-time favorites stories, The Chessmen of Mars, in which he created a place that’s weird and eerie even by Martian standards–and made it totally believable.

And I think it’s obvious to Tarzan fans that Wytt owes some of his inspiration to Tarzan’s easily-frightened little monkey, Nkima.

As a storyteller, I’m always on the lookout to learn from other storytellers. Self-education never stops. Something of all my favorite authors has gone into all of my Bell Mountain books. Sir Thomas Malory, Homer, The Mabinogion; Burroughs, Agatha Christie, Walter R. Brooks, H.R.F. Keating–and everyone else whose work I’ve enjoyed. Not forgetting Ross McDonald, who taught me how to write sentences that make themselves easy to read.

I could go on like this all day. But to sum it up–

If you want to be a writer… read!

‘Canada Won’t Let You Know the Truth About Vampires’ (2013)

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Telling the truth is not allowed in Canada, if the truth is “hateful.”


Don’t be too surprised if Canada gets overrun with vampires someday. But isn’t a plague of vampires a small price to pay for engineering “hate” out of the system? I mean, if they can’t order people’s emotions, what’s the point of anybody being in the government?

‘How Great Thou Art’

This is another hymn my grandma and my mother used to sing around the house–How Great Thou Art. I like this simple, mellow rendition by Alan Jackson.

Cats & Toasters

Let’s be fair, and admit that there’s nothing in a cat’s natural gifts that prepare him or her to deal with toasters. A toaster is like a printer, only bread comes out instead of paper. It provides cats with an excellent excuse to show how far they can jump backwards.

I never knew I could jump backwards at all, until I had to.

The Dems’ Red-Hot Game Show

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I’ve just learned that tonight there’ll be another installment of the great new game show, “Who Can Give Away the Most Free Stuff?”, and I am eagerly looking forward to not watching it.

Free Medicare for all! College tuition! School lunch! Free, free, free!

The winner gets a four-year vacation in the White House and a lifetime of ever-increasing fabulous wealth, paid for by the American people. In fact, it’s just about certain that the winner will never again, for the rest of his or her or xer life, ever have to pay for anything at all.

Produced by the Democrat Party and Unspeakably Corrupt Productions, this show easily outdraws “Moesha” reruns and that other show about that fisherman who never catches anything.

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