Cat Joie de Vivre

This kitten’s name is Pikachu, which is Middle Hittite for “who %$#@#ed with my curtains!?” Seriously, though–well, actually this is not the best opportunity to be serious. Let’s just have fun. Cats know that much!


Now That’s a Question!

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This just popped back into my head after many years’ absence: the most annoying question I’ve ever been asked as a writer.

No, it’s not “How long did it take you to write it?” Everybody asks that. I don’t know why, but they do.

When, after much difficulty, my very first novel was published in 1986, one of my next-door neighbors, with a happy smile on his face, asked me this:

“So when’s it going to be a TV movie?”

Perish the thought that he would buy the book and read it, or even go to see the movie if they made a movie of it. He wanted it on TV. Cheap, cheap, cheap.

One thing I’ve learned over the years: people who see you every day, and talk to you, hardly ever want to read your books. And I don’t know why.


This Blog Needs You

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When you come right down to it, all I can do for this little cyber-enterprise is write the articles and post the pictures. Everything else has to be done by you, the readers.

I depend on you to circulate the posts–by sharing them on Facebook, if you have it, or other social media sites, and trying a bit of word-of-mouth advertising when you think of it. We can only grow by adding new readers, new visitors.

We’ve been growing steadily since 2012, and so far 2017 is shaping up to be our best year yet.

I just wanted to say “Thank you,” and now I’ve said it.


Revenge of Chucky

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No, I’m not talking about the homicidal doll in several horror movies. I mean the crazed Democrat senator from New York, Chucky Schumer.

Recently Chucky was dining at a folksy little Upper East Side restaurant, Sette Mezzo (salad, $18, fish dish, $40 and up–not exactly the White Castle), when he spotted Joseph Califano and his wife at a nearby table. Califano is a high-echelon Democrat who used to be a member of Jimmy Carter’s cabinet. But his wife, Hilary, voted for Donald Trump for president; which inspired Chucky to assault them ( http://pagesix.com/2017/03/27/schumer-loses-cool-with-trump-supporter-at-swanky-restaurant/?_ga=1.84344977.900017482.1434638142&utm_campaign=SocialFlow&utm_source=NYPFacebook&utm_medium=SocialFlow&sr_share=facebook ).

Yelling and screaming at Mrs. Califano for voting for Trump, the revered elder statesman drove the Califanos out of the restaurant, and then got up and followed them out to the sidewalk so he could yell at them some more. (There is a witness who says it didn’t happen quite like that, but it doesn’t look like anyone believes him. All the other witnesses tell a more exciting story.) We don’t know why the Califanos didn’t call the police.

Again, and yet again, these people, these Democrats, these far-out lefty loons, are showing us who they are; and if we ever again, in a paroxysm of national folly, allow them to take power over us, we will deserve what happens to us.


Does Entertainment Shrivel Your Brain?

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For as long as there have been people, there have been story-tellers. God created us in His image, and so we like to create things, too. And one of the things we create is stories.

Being sinners, we also create idols, street gangs, rap music, poison gas, and communism, among other things. And we create stories that edify, stories that ease or stir the soul–and stories that debase and corrupt the hearer.

Some of you have said you’re fed up with “entertainment,” especially TV and movies, it’s all cheap and worthless, if not downright malevolent–and I’m not here to disagree with you. Crikey–it’s gotten so anyone who’s looking for a life partner demands that he or she be “funny.” Like it’s everybody’s job to entertain you, all the time.

You will note I have posted a picture of the Three Stooges. Why? Well, if I’m really stressed out, their inane antics are a pick-me-up. And that’s a legitimate purpose of a story. As J.R.R. Tolkien said, fiction often provides a kind of escape, and no one blames a prisoner for trying to escape.

In addition to meeting my needs for vegging out from time to time, movies and novels, etc., are my diet as a story-teller. I learn by listening to other people’s stories; that’s how I learn to tell my stories. I gobble up stories, always trying to learn from them even while I’m chilling out. I hope the finished product convinces you that I’m on the right track.

This is a large subject and I don’t propose to write a book about it. Some “entertainment” is good for us, some is bad, and some is only good or bad depending on how we as individuals respond to it. There is a huge amount of entertainment out there that’s downright toxic, pure crapola. It’s good stuff to avoid.

I do know a few persons who never consume any form of fiction, and I just can’t imagine how they get by without any stories at all. Well, true, all of them watch TV news, and some of that’s fiction, and the sum total of all its parts is more fiction than anything else. But I would much rather get my fiction from Jules Verne than from CNN.


Biggest Dinosaur Yet?

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Jesus defend us, the news is just so bad this morning, I can’t  bring myself to write about it. Come, Lord Jesus, come! You can’t get here too soon.

Meanwhile, scientists in Western Australia have discovered what looks like the biggest dinosaur footprint ever found ( https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/3189717/worlds-largest-dinosaur-footprint-discovered-in-australias-jurassic-park/ ). Unfortunately, it’s almost axiomatic in paleontology that wherever you find a lot of footprints, you never find bones: so whatever anyone wants to say about these Australian dinosaurs, it’s all based on just the footprints. Which is better than nothing.

These great big prints were made by sauropods, more famously known as “brontosaurs,” and the biggest of the prints is almost as big as a grown man. The prints match up with the kind of prints made by the kind of feet that sauropods, going by their skeletons, are known to have had.

Scientists are also excited that they’ve found stegosaur prints in the area, the first ever found in Australia.

I remember when all the dinosaurs we knew about came from Western North America, the fringes of Western Europe, and the Gobi Desert. Nothing known from Africa, South America, Australia, Eastern Europe, etc. Now we’re finding dinosaurs everywhere we look. It’s hard to keep up with the discoveries!

Should not these discoveries inspire us with awe for God and the vastness, the majesty, and the infinite complexity of His created natural order? The more of it we learn about, the more we find we’ve yet to learn. We will never reach the limits of it!

In which we see the wisdom of God, in making it so much bigger even than our imaginations…


Encore: ‘Christ Shall Have Dominion’

Oh, do the wicked not want to hear this! Maybe that’s why the comments had to be disabled on the youtube page.

Join the folks at Grace Community Church, San Antonio, Texas, in singing Christ Shall Have Dominion. At least sing the chorus: “Christ shall have dominion over land and sea, Earth’s remotest regions shall His empire be.” And sing it loud! It may be God will hear us.


Pets vs. Mirrors

Most animals just don’t get mirrors. I discovered this early in life, when I showed my “chameleon” (an anole, actually) a hand mirror and was amazed by the little lizard’s violent reaction to his own reflection. I’m surprised he didn’t blow a gasket.

So here we are with dogs and cats, goats, a horse, lizards, and even a monkey, all of them baffled by that mysterious expanse of glass. We’ve seen our pets figure out harder things that mirrors, but mirrors stump them. My iguana paid no attention to mirrors, but never did work out why he couldn’t eat pictures of strawberries painted on the plate.

P.S.–I may be having Facebook issues again, so I’d be obliged to anyone who shares this post on his or her FB page, just so I can see if it generates referrals.


Chelsea Clinton: Genius?

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No sooner do I post a wee bit of fiction for humorous effect that this item comes along and tops it.

Chelsea Clinton–already earmarked by some for high political office, like her parents, Bill and Hillary–saw a picture of Abraham Lincoln wearing a “Make America Great Again” hat and, it seems, got the willies over it, to the point of publicly asking if the image were photoshopped: the alternative being, it was real ( http://www.thegatewaypundit.com/2017/03/dumb-brick-chelsea-clinton-wonders-lincoln-maga-hat-photoshopped/ ).

And you thought Joe Collidge was silly for being freaked out by The Fly.

Some deemed it necessary to reassure Chelsea that Lincoln did not actually support Donald Trump’s presidential campaign.

She is obviously destined for the U.S. Senate.


Joe Collidge Freaks Out!

I have the sad duty to tell you that our friend Joe Collidge has injured himself, reacting to this scene from the old 1958 horror movie, The Fly.

When he saw the little half-fly, half-human character get caught in the web and eaten by the spider–the film was being shown in class, Gender Studies 666–poor Joe totally freaked out. Leaping from his seat, he attempted to charge out of the room without first opening the door.

As some of you may know, Joe regularly receives shots of moth hormones, intended to transition him from human male to I don’t know what, anymore. Well, it’s an experiment. It has resulted in him sprouting a pair of moth antennae on his forehead and developing a taste for socks and handkerchiefs. Now it appears he has also come down with intense arachnophobia.

Having rendered himself unconscious by his collision with the door, Joe is currently unavailable for comment.


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