Now’s your chance to avoid being swept up in the latest board game craze, Profumo–the game that permanently changes you into a member of another species.
For those who get turned into cats, I suppose it’s not so bad. But there have been many complaints about people being turned into much less desirable species–bedbugs, flatworms, crabgrass, etc. No one is quite sure how Profumo works, or even how to play: it seems the rules were written by a person who was quite mad at the time. All we know is that it has been shown to be very dangerous to spend more than 20 minutes or so trying to play it.
Sponsored by the Democrat National Committee, manufactured by Cthulhu Brothers Inc., Profumo costs $12,385 per copy and is available at most disreputable stores–the kind of store you may be able to enter easily enough, but coming out again is problematic.
And now it’s time for me to enjoy a cigar before I begin the epic work of trimming our Christmas tree.
I’m hoping no one gives me a copy of Profumo as a present. A man in Lima, Ohio, was transformed into a yak just by unwrapping the game.