Let’s Do It Today!

G’day! Byron the Quokka here, to tell you we have 74,974 comments–which means we only need 26 more–just 26 more!–to reach that glorious 75,000-comment milestone.

We don’t really need all day to round up another 26 comments, do we?

And the winner gets a dandy prize, your choice–an autographed copy of one of Lee’s books, or this cool red-and-white T-shirt that says “If they have to kill us, they’ve lost”: a guaranteed conversation piece.

Let’s bring in those comments, boys ‘n’ girls, and show the Big Tech censors that they can’t make us cry uncle!

Celebrity Norbert!

I do wish this video were longer, but a minute of Norbert is a minute of joy. He hasn’t yet graduated to feature-length movies. A proposal to remake Gone With the Wind with Norbert in the role of Admiral Halsey fell through when they couldn’t find an aircraft carrier.


Are These Cats Quite All There?

What’s going on between the two cats in this video? The one has an attack of the zoomies. The other doesn’t, but has decided he doesn’t want to get left out. Left out of what? Honk when you figure it out; I’ve given up.

Astounding Fact: It’s very hard to tell when your pet tortoise has the zoomies.

Urgent! The Last 100 Views

Here's Your Weekly Dose Of Cute! (#42) | Cute animals, Cute funny animals,  Cute baby animals

(Special bulletin from Byron the Quokka, whose job it is to keep up with these things.)

G’day! Big news about the current comment contest–the push for 75,000 comments.

We have less than 100 comments to go, to reach that milestone! Do we really need all week to come up with 100 comments?

The winner gets an autographed copy of one of Lee’s books–or a cool red-and-white T-shirt that says, “If they have to kill us, they’ve lost.” You get to choose.

Waddaya say we wrap this up in just another two days–or even less? Show the Big Tech censors that they can’t stop us!

I cannot wait to hand out this prize!

Toddler Comforts Anxious Dog

This little girl is only two years old and she’s already helping a friend in need–the family dog, Lulu. The dog’s upset because the owner has gone out. The baby understands that and sets out to make the dog feel better. I don’t know about you, but I’m impressed! That’s quite a head on those little shoulders.

Whelk & Crayfish: Incompatible?

Crusty's Trombone Lessons ('Oy, Rodney') – Lee Duigon

“The curse of true love never did run smooth,” philosophizes Violet Crepuscular, introducing Chapter CDXXIX of her epic romance, Oy, Rodney. “Here Cupid  must deal with a recalcitrant crayfish and a whelk with a chip on its shoulder!”

Resuming his courtship of Lady Margo Cargo, Lord Jeremy Coldsore is dismayed to find his pet Whelk, Stuart, and her pet crayfish, Oswin, just don’t get along. This could prove to be an obstacle to their marriage.

When Stuart and Oswin are put in the same aquarium, they sulk. “This is terrible!” expostulates Lady Margo. “How can you and I live together in wedded bliss, if our pets are going to detest each other?”

Her crusty old butler, Crusty, offers a novel solution. “Normal people,” he says, “would just leave the two bugs in separate aquariums.” Lady Margo removes her upholstered wooden leg and clouts him with it. “You have no romance in your soul, Crusty!” she aviates.

This is an astonishingly feeble chapter, even for Violet Crepuscular. Has her well of invention finally run dry?

“I am not the kind of writer whose well of invention runs dry!” she confides to the reader. “What I’m doing, actually, is setting the stage for a well-nigh indescribable catastrophe which puts the planet itself at risk!

“Remember what Constable Chumley always says: ‘Yair flivvick ma’ wye when yair groptie fain cry!’ It is the guiding principle that guides me from one chapter to the next.”

Who can argue with that?

Crazy for Mice?

Now that’s eccentric. Big-time eccentric: building a hobbit village in your garden… for mice. But that’s just what this man named Simon has done. Obviously the English have not forgotten how to be eccentric.

I’ve had many pet mice, and I can tell you they’re affectionate, adaptable, and very intelligent. If a mouse could live ten years, he’d be practicing law.

These are wild mice, in the video. Now that they’ve got nice houses of their own, they don’t come into Simon’s house.

There’s something very Beatrix Potter about this…

Byron’s TV Listings, June 19

What's On TV October 16, 1962 – PugetSoundMedia

G’day, TV watchers! Byron the Quokka here, with another weekend’s worth of scrumptious TV viewing brought to you by Quokka University. And if you’re wondering where we got these shows–don’t ask!

Here are some samples to whet your appetite.

7:00 P.M.  Ch. 10  MOVIE–Tragedy/Musical

The classic Greek tragedy “Medea” (1956) gets a musical makeover with Zsa Zsa Gabor in the title role. Featuring the hit song, “Jason, Schmason, Where’s the Basin?” Jason: Zero Mostel. Theseus: Phil Silvers. Featuring Elston Howard and his orchestra.


Join host Bill Cullen as he reveals the celebrity guests’ most shameful secrets! Panel: Eleanor Roosevelt, Mel Blanc, Andy Devine, and Nature Boy Buddy Rodgers, with Dr. Phil to provide free counseling to the nationally disgraced winner.

Ch. 16  KHAN FOR A DAY–Situation Comedy

Cousin Sven (Jack Soo) has inherited a Mongol horde–and doesn’t know what to do with it! Can he figure it out before they eat him out of house and home? Mayor Fortinbras: Phyllis Diller. President Johnson: Edgar Buchanan. Special guest star: Jerry Mathers as The Beaver.

7:30 P.M.  Ch. 21   PINKY LEE’S JOURNAL–News/Talk/Gibberish

Comedian Pinky Lee interviews newsmakers Mervyn Puncho and talking dolphin Flipper McGee on the crisis of cocktail waitresses going on strike in Zanzibar. Has the Senate got an ace up its sleeve?

7:37 P.M.  Ch. 36  ACTION IN THE AFTERNOON–Western Drama

Horror impresario Zacherley plays the town undertaker of Codbiter, New Mexico. There’s no need for him to drum up business when depressed gunslinger The Toledo Kid (James Earl Jones) comes to town! Florist: Jack Elam. Interior Decorator: George “The Animal” Steele. Sheriff Shootfirst: Bob Denver.

And that’s only a sample of what you’ll get when you tune in this weekend! Make sure you have plenty of eucalyptus leaves on hand.

Quokka eating a leaf on Rottnest Island Stock Photo - Alamy

Baby Bunnies, Rise & Shine

This is not the most exciting video I’ve ever posted. There may be viewers, for all I know, who respond with great agitation to videos of sleeping baby bunnies. If you are one of them, we’d love to hear from you.

Was it the bunnies’ own idea to sleep in an orderly row?

We Kneed Harder Dyvercity Traning!!!!

Teacher Yelling High Res Stock Images | Shutterstock

Wood yiu beleave it??? We stil has peeple heer “at” Collidge thay “Thinck” Bad Thawts!!!! Thay doughnt think Rite Things “at awl” and In Facked thay think Wroong Things!!! And thay say “Wroohng Things tooo!!”! Haow “are” yiu sapoased To Has trooue Dyvercity wen peeple thay doughnt think “the” Rite Whay???

So heer “at the” Stoodint Soviet we has voated “to” maik Dyvercity Traning way harrder!!! And unlest yiu Say evry Thing yiu are sposed “to” say,, and nevvir Say “wroangh things” well too Bad foar yiu,, yiu cant Get “no” Daploamer!!!!! Yiu whil Nevvir Gradurayte!!!!!!!!!!

And wee whil Keeep “yiu heer” until Yore Mined Is Rite!!!!!!

Thare aslo whil be Punnitchmints foar “thinking” bad thawts!!! O’fenders thay whil be put in-syde a Swett Bocks on reel Hot daze and wen it “is” Coled thay whil has to sleap Out-syde whith-Out “a” Blankit!!!!!

And it is awl jist “like” Chare-Man Maow he onct sayed,, “we” are “doingthis” to Bad Peeple to Maik themb Gooud!!!!!!!!!!

And doughnt evvin think “Of” Traying “to” Excape!!!!! We whil has whach Tawers and meen Dawgs to Stopp yiu!!!