Did I Really See This?

So I walk into a bank this morning, and I see this guy sitting in front of a desk, talking to a bank officer. Let me describe him to you, from the top down.

He was wearing a top hat, a la Fred Astaire, with a big long feather sticking out of it. His brown hair was long and bushy. His beard reached down almost to his navel, and he had carefully sculpted it so that it was shaped like a dagger–and had dyed it a dull black, maybe with shoe polish.

From what I could see of the rest of him, he was covered with tattoos from the neck down. I don’t know what it costs to turn yourself into the Illustrated Man. Probably a lot. And he was wearing a black leather jacket festooned with a multitude of metal things, trinkets and such.

He presented a bizarre visual experience. I can’t say I’m used to seeing characters like this in a bank. Hardly the place for it: this was definitely more like Walmart chic. And I couldn’t help wondering, “What the flaming dickens is he supposed to be?” It also crossed my mind, “Am I all right? Am I really seeing this?”

Not to judge by appearances, and all that–but it’s obvious this man went to a great deal of trouble to create that appearance. For what conceivable purpose? What message was he seeking to convey? I mean, is this what Western civilization looks like when it’s finally turned into a total pile of drivel? And can I please wake up now?

11 comments on “Did I Really See This?

  1. Oh, if only we could all wake up from this nightmare on Elm St. and everywhere else. It is almost beyond … well, just beyond. They are everywhere, and unfortunately, most of them breed and vote.

  2. There! And we thought all the nuts were on Sunset Blvd., L.A. You should come down here to South Beach and really choke.

  3. I wonder about your sanity at times so, just tell me it is all gonna be OK!

    Paul Herbert : family of Zimmerman sui juris sovereign living soul, holder of the office of Bexar County Sheriff Inhabitant on the land of Texas republic

  4. I’ve seen sights that were similarly bizarre. I don’t have any idea what is behind it. Apparently this is some bizarre form of self-expression or, more likely, a craving for attention.

    It reminds me of the sixties and seventies, when long hair was all the rage and millions of sycophantic young males coiffed themselves with impressive manes which resembled those of the Rock gods du jour, and somehow this imitation was explained as an expression of their individualism. Add a fake Cockney accent and you too could be Hall of Fame material. I must confess to being a bit shaggy at times, in my youth, probably due to neglect, but I never understood the sideshow appearance some of my age-peers cultivated.

    Whatever is behind it, the forces of darkness are more than willing to exploit these habits and we see people in an inexorable race to see how freaky they can be.

  5. Those who have never used psychoactive drugs don’t understand the alternate reality these people live in. They stay high every day where the weird is perceived as desirable – with many, the more weird the better. Now you know. A caveat; the devil is behind the drug usage – he loves to deform man who is created in the image of God.

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