Now this is an intolerable situation. You’re minding your own business, just doing a spot of community organizing, or begging, and all of a sudden a bee lands on your arm and zap! You’re history.
Not to worry. As soon as gun control–oops! I meant “gun safety”–is put on a solid footing in America, and that pesky Second Amendment laid to rest, the government has planned a thorough-going program of bee control. All bees will be registered and put in a national data base. All bees will be tested for mental health. The new controls will ensure that no American–except for maybe the odd rich person or two– will ever be stung (by a bee) again. “We can promise you that,” says King Barack I’s close personal adviser, Satan.
“It may cost several gazillion dollars,” added Clown Prince Joseph Biden, “but if it saves one middle-class person’s life, it’ll be worth it.”