How many liberals does it take to change a light bulb? Or should we be asking how many light bulbs it takes to change a liberal?
Hey, if you’ve got “smart” light bulbs in your house–and you should be very afraid when certain people use that word–the technological wizards of our age say these bulbs will synchronize with your TV system to make horror movies scarier ( http://www.ubergizmo.com/2014/12/syfys-12-monkeys-tv-show-will-sync-with-phillips-hue-lighting-system/ ). Somehow your home lighting will fade in and out in conjunction with what’s happening on the screen in the remake of 12 Monkeys. (I saw the original when it came out, 20 years ago, and it made no impression on me whatsoever.) This process has already been pioneered with the broadcast of the immortal horror classic, Sharknado 2.
“Ooh, ooh, what a great idea! Let’s have some stranger out there controlling the lights in our homes! Oh, I just knew it’d be great, if we got smart bulbs!”
I dunno. I watch horror movies for relief. If you wanted to make them truly scary, plug in Michelle Obama, John Boehner, the idiot John Kerry, or Comrade Elizabeth Warren. That’d make the movies scarier.
Do you really, truly, honestly want someone, God knows where, messing around with stuff inside your home? You’re honest-to-gosh okay with that?
“But, dude, it’s new! It’s smart! It’s technology, man!”
You blocks, you stones, you worse than senseless things…
P.S. Sorry, can’t get the link to work. You’ll have to take my word for this one.