Lying Ain’t What It Used to Be

Image result for images of liar, liar pants on fire

I just sat down to work when the phone rang. I picked it up, and what do I hear? “This is the call-back you requested [lie] after viewing our commercial [lie: I have no television] for our Acme Supercalifragilistic Back Brace…”

I protest the shameful decline in the art of lying. The time-honored whole flaming point of a lie was to be believed. I mean, what is the point of a lie that no one, not even an imbecile, would believe? How was an unbelievable, stupid lie ever going to get you out of trouble? They know doggone well that I never requested any call from them. Do they think I don’t know I never asked them to call me?

But this is the year when some liar, with absolutely no sane expectation of being believed, could address a whole convention hall full of people, plus TV cameras reaching out to millions of viewers, and call Hillary Clinton, former captain of her hubby’s Bimbo Eruption Squad, the champion and defender of women who have suffered sexual harassment. That would be damn near every woman who’s had any dealings with Mr. Clinton.

In the Bible, the midwives lied to Pharaoh to save Israelite babies from being killed. It worked because Pharaoh believed them. But nowadays they would have told him, “Global Warming is causing Israelites to have babies: just slap on some higher taxes, and that’ll do the trick.” Then again, maybe Pharaoh had already heard that 97% of Egyptian magicians and astrologers believe in Global Warming, so it must be true. After all, our astrologers and magicians believe in it.

You could go blind, trying to count the hopeless, lame, preposterous lies that are handed out today.

You’d think any liar who had so little talent for it… might as well tell the truth.

6 comments on “Lying Ain’t What It Used to Be

  1. An A+ for this great article that I can show to my children. The art of dirty politics is to lie about the lies, to the point that wherever we look, we are to believe one lie or the other, but never the truth. The truth doesn’t get much, if any, exposure these days because almost all talking heads merely bobble. The larger our media grew, the smaller the window of truth became. Every election, we think, Is that a light at the end of the tunnel or is it just another light to another tunnel? I’m still waiting for the “pants [and pantsuits] on fire.”

  2. I get solicitation calls all the time, asking for someone that I’ve never heard of and asking if they were happy with their recent windshield service. Then they apologize for calling me by mistake but; “by the way, do you need a windshield replacement?” If you question this they will usually come up with some cock & bull about their records must be out of date even thought I’ve had my number for over 5 years.

    My current response is to act concerned and to ask if there was some childhood trauma that forced them into a career which requires them to tell outright lies in order to make a living. I get some interesting responses. If I get past the initial shock of my initial question I politely point out that my experience has always been that any relationship which starts with a lie is unlikely to ever turn out well and that by lying to me they have essentially guaranteed that I will never do business with them. If they start out with a lie I already know that they are dishonest.

    I live in an area where the economy is not what you’d call robust. Many businesses here seem to operate less than ethically; much more so than anyplace else I’ve ever lived. There’s a windshield shop on every corner and many of them are fly-by-night operations, playing upon the easy money of dealing with insurance companies. Some years ago I did business with one of these companies and they gave inaccurate information to my insurance company, then tried to get an additional $100 out of me. I said fine, I’ll pay, but then I’ll report you for insurance fraud. They turned into choir boys instantly thereafter. (There is at least one reputable windshield shop in town too, and I deal with them exclusively.)

    1. What concerns me is this whole business–originally conceived in our great colleges and universities, and quickly adopted by our politicians–of lying for its own sake, as if it were some legitimate form of communication. They expect us to believe things that we know to be untrue: because, as they teach it, there’s no such thing as truth anyhow.

      I wouldn’t want to be standing in their shoes, come the Judgment.

    2. Anything based upon lies is bound to end badly. If an entire civilization is lie-based, that civilization will suffer in the long run, and that’s part of what is wrong in America these days. The colleges are no longer about education; they are about indoctrination to the “proper” political views.

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