My First Nooze Post!

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I admit I don’t understand humans at all.

Hi! It’s me, Byron the Quokka, and this is my first nooze post. I’ve seen Lee do it hundreds of time–how hard can it be? Even Joe Collidge can do it!

Anyhow, you humans should all watch out because there is an Evolutionary Paradox out there that will do you in if you take pills to grow hair! ( As you have probbly guessed, there are no bald quokkas–I mean, would that look weird or what? Like that cool show with William Shatner, all about The Unexplained–

Whew! Caught myself getting sidetracked. Mustn’t do that!

We once found an Evolutionary Paradox here on our island, it was disgusting and all the quokkas were afraid of it. I forget what it was. This one that has just been discovered in the nooze, though, is much worse–for humans, that is. These men with gigantic big muscles and lots and lots of hair, it turns out they can’t buy fertilizer. Something about their wives can’t have babies. Well, we told you that you need a pouch for that, didn’t we? Otherwise there’s no place to put the baby when you’re not using it.

There is also something in the story about “male beauty,” but we quokkas find such discussions to be in very poor taste.

And that’s the morning news! Easy as pie!

10 comments on “My First Nooze Post!

    1. I just hope he can hold the fort while I write my Newswithviews column. I ***wanted*** to go outside and work on my new book–but of course it’s raining now.

  1. Ewwww! What grotesquerie. I can’t help remembering the old saying, “God always forgives; man sometimes forgives; nature never forgives.” Steroids, “trans” fantasies — they all wind up sterile and they all wind up grotesque.

  2. I need to object to the unlicensed use of my image (I’m the one on the left). There are laws governing such use, but I’m not sure that they are enforceable when an marsupial is involved. 🙂

    Sheeesh! Look at that guy! Sure he’s strong, but he has to be torpedoing his overall health.

    Welcome to the blog Byron. You are already a valued and loved member of the community.

    1. Don’t look now, but Byron has succeeded in attracting 300+ views today. Looks like I’ll have to assign him a locker.

    2. Going to bed, I’ll track it down tomorrow morning. Gotta get up early so I can post a hymn before going out to collect cobwebs in the doctor’s waiting room.

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