Song: ‘I’m the Substitute Vicar from Zanzibar’

(Thanks to Phoebe for the suggestion)

When life in the parish gets thicker and thicker,

You may have a call for a substitute vicar.

And what a delight if he comes from afar!

I’m the substitute vicar from Zanzibar!

Chorus: He’s the substitute vicar from Zanzibar.

I’m sure you don’t mind if I preach in Swahili.

Are you paying attention? Oh, no, not really!

I saw you nodding, whoever you are–

I’m the substitute vicar from Zanzibar!

Chorus

(Additional verses will suggest themselves to the alert reader.)