They’re Marrying… Themselves

Mirror Mirror On The Wall - Who Is The Best Of Them All

Where to find your future marriage partner!

(Yeah, but are they really compatible?)

Not that it’s sweeping the civilized world–not yet, at least–but it’s the kind of “man bites dog” story that nooze media love to latch onto. And so we have CNN going on and on for hundreds of words about women who marry themselves (

This practice has legal status nowhere on earth (I can’t speak for Mars) and hardly anybody does it. CNN calls it a “symbolic expression of deep self-love.”

Ye gods, ain’t we got enough of that already?

My mother used to sing this little song: “I love me, I think I’m grand,/ when I go to the movies I hold my hand./ I put my arm around my waist,/ if I get fresh, I slap my face.”

What if the “marriage” to oneself (aka “sologamy”) doesn’t work out–irreconcilable differences and all that? “She snores!” “I do not! Anyway, her feet stink!” “Why, you–!” Certs is a breath mint! Certs is a candy mint! Marriage counselor runs off to soak his head.

Wait’ll people discover you can become a YouTube star by marrying yourself. Put up a few videos and suddenly you’ll have a whole new Lifestyle to “celebrate.” The videos don’t even have to be real.


10 comments on “They’re Marrying… Themselves

  1. I always wondered how these people who supposedly married themselves would manage a divorce.

  2. I’ve heard of some strange ones over the years. I remember an article about a woman that “married” a building. Another “married” a bridge. Then there was the trend of Japanese men “marrying” their anime character body pillows.

    But marrying yourself requires a special level of narcissism.

  3. There is in Greek mythology, a story of Narcissus, who fell deeply in love with himself. And when he saw his own reflection in water, so beautiful was it, he was so drawn to his image that he could not leave the waters edge. Thus, after a time this caused him to weaken and die.

    These women who “married” themselves, worship themselves, and have made themselves gods. And any who willingly took part in their “marriage” insanity are also just as deceived and as malevolent.

  4. The more I pondered this, I realized, in one way, this might be a blessing. It seems most likely, those younger ones who indulge in these kinds of delusions will probably never have any offspring, whose minds would be corrupted by their vile beliefs and actions.

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