I been To A sayonce!!

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As a Interllectural, i dont beleave in no life “After” death exept wen Some Peple thay get re-incarcerated and come “back” as somboddy else and i was Talking Abote that wen some Other stodent {I didnt know her} she sayed Yiu “”wuldnt say that Iff” yiu gone to a Sayonce “Whey ‘don” yiu come to my Dorm Roomb to-nite”  and “thenn yiu” wil see!

So i whent thare Lasst nihght and she “got” us To sit at This litle Tabel with a Weegee Bored on it and we put Our fingres on this hear Platstic Thing and she turnt offf al the lihghts and kep saying Is Any Boddy thare??? Wel that was kind of Boaring but thenn Al of A Suden this Squeeky Voice it sayed “I Amb Hear!” and i seen this litle Puppit kind of parson floting over the Tabel and that Gril she sayed “shhhh! it Is a” Spirrit and evin thuhgh I amb a Introlllectural i stil Got Sort Of scared!!!

But i asked how “Come thare” is that String coming out of his Head? she toled me Dont “mind” that it Is Not a “string, it Is” exoplasum It connecks him “to” the Spirrit Worled!

It turns out he is the gost of a Sammereye from Jappan he dyed like 5 Thosand years aggo and he sayed “i amb hear to Tell the Fuchure!!

Wel i thuhght it was Strange his Vice it sonded like It “was” from somwear in the Back of the roomb but she sayed “dont Mind” that becose “he has To Talk with-out Vocle Cords he Is a” Spirrit and he got A messidge four yiu! And he sayed if I wuld come to a Sayonce evry weak the Spirrits thay wuld get to Work “On” the Other Side “and we Can make Hillery be Pressident by This hear Time” neckst yeer!!

O watt goood news!!! i amlost falled out Of “the” Chare! and i sayed “of Corse! i” wil come and Do Sayonce evry weak you bet!!!” and he made me Prommis to doo it and then he jist wisked up to the seeling and Dis-apeered and the Sayonce it was over and the gril she turnt on the Lihght!

And yiu know watt she sayed thenn??? “That wil be $50.00 dollers pleese!!!”

I culdnt beleave it! i hasnt got “no $50.00 dollers;, i hasnt evin Got no $5.00 dollers!” and then this gye al dresst in Black i didnt see him befour,, he “must of” been Hideing oar maybe he “was” geting reddy to go fishin becose he Had a fishin pole leenin aginst the whall-,-wuld yiu beleave it he “slaped” me arond and puled my pockits In-side Out and wen he seen i reely dint have no Monny he sayed A Sayonce “it cost monny, yiu are jist a Bum, get out” of heere And “dont yiu never come B ack yiu big Bum!!!

Gee wiz i shure Hope i “can” borow the monny so the Spirrits thay can make Hillery be Pressadint! Iff anny of yiu ordrinary dum peple reed this i hope yiu Send me som!!!

About leeduigon

I have lived in Metuchen, NJ, all my life. I have been married to my wife Patricia since 1977. I am a former newspaper editor and reporter. I was also the owner-operator of my own small business for several years. I wrote various novels and short stories published during 1980s and 1990s. I am a long-time student of judo and Japanese swordsmanship (kenjutsu). I also play chess, basketball, and military and sports simulations. View all posts by leeduigon

3 responses to “I been To A sayonce!!

  • UnKnowable

    Who could argue with an experience like that? It HAS to be real. That guy in black is actually proof, because no one would delay an activity like fishing unless it were impotent. (This always happens when I write to Joe C.) Butt, I’m convinced that the metal-fiscal world is as reel as the real on that fishing pole. (That last sentence is a work of art, even if I do say so myself.)

    When I was a kid, there was a big radio station a long ways away called WDGY and everyone called it WeeGee for short. They played reely gud moos-ic, even though the disk jokkees sounded like they’d had way too much coffee, so they must have been onto sumthing with that name. It was always daytiem win we lessened to iT, so they must’ve been doing say-once’s at nite.

    I know that the DJs were highly physic, because they could predict when a song would be a hit. They’d play a song and say they thought it was gonna be a hit, and sure nuff, they’d play it ten more times that day. There was one “D” jay that did that more than anybody else and he always had brand new convertible cars and fancy clothes, even though he made $1.50 an hour. One day he said he didn’t like a song and thay founded him runned over by his own convertible Chevy.

    I’m sure glad you got me back on track, Joe. That rodeo station only plays dumm songs about country hix these days, but I’m going to EbAY and look for a sayonce radio so I can listen to them again. If I have any money left, I’ll send it to you for you’re next sayonce. 🙂

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  • thewhiterabbit2016

    In college I came across a group of students who were all excited about how the Quija Board had spoken to them. Later on when I ran into them they were all excited about living their lives according to the I-Ching. Haven’t seen them since but they are probably now living by Numerology.

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