We wont tollarate Triger werds!!

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We has grate news to-day!! Hear at Collidge the Inglish Depotmint have releesed a Dishin alongg whith “the” reglur List of Prohabbited O’fensive Gender Pacific nounds “And” pro-nounds like father; mother; him, her, me, my and alll. This Dishin it “is” a List of Triger Werds that no boddy thay “are aloud” to say or rite becose it wil Triger a Pisycho Loggicle Troma and if yiu says them yiu wil “has to” get Sensertiffidy Traning!!!

Hear is The Dishin i has coppyed it jist as the Inglish Depotmint thay printid it althohgh thare mihght Be “some” werds that isnt Speled careckly–:,

Artachoke Ballony Daffadill Glad Grasp (whatevver “that” meens!) In Doors Kid Lihght Noze On Peepee Pleaze Quarter Seven Untill Wite and thare is aslo some “otthers” butt i cudnt reed Them becose it taked Too long! Iff any boddy thay says them,, yiu has “to” re-port it to “the” Byus Responts Teem and Thay willl “punnish” that o’fensive Racist.

Yiu has got to edmit Our Collidges thay making “Treemendus” Progresst becose us Intrallecturals we Know “how” to combatt Racism and Sexism and aslo we has band Man-tarrupting and Man-splaning it is probly “A good Thing” for me, oops! that I amb not axackly a Man any moar! i amb part Moth fromb all them Hoarmoans that “got” Shot into me oops! Got to stop “sayin” Me or thare wil Be trubble.

 

About leeduigon

I have lived in Metuchen, NJ, all my life. I have been married to my wife Patricia since 1977. I am a former newspaper editor and reporter. I was also the owner-operator of my own small business for several years. I wrote various novels and short stories published during 1980s and 1990s. I am a long-time student of judo and Japanese swordsmanship (kenjutsu). I also play chess, basketball, and military and sports simulations. View all posts by leeduigon

4 responses to “We wont tollarate Triger werds!!

  • Phoebe

    I think Joe will be safe, since he’s virtually unintelligible most of the time. But (gasp) he’s used the words “trigger” and “shot” — these words alone are triggering! 🙂

    Actually, most students at our collidges these days should be safe from the language police, since they speak mostly in grunts and squawks.

    Like

  • UnKnowable

    Trigger might be the greatest trigger word of all. Where’s my Play-Doh? 🙂

    Like

  • thewhiterabbit2016

    Joe Collige needs to embrace Hinduism. They believe we have all evolved from pond scum up to human beings, and then we have to go through many incarnations where we can be male one time and female the next.

    Like

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