Study Claims Half of UK Men are Impotent

Image result for images of non-functioning man

Yikes! They polled a couple thousand guys and found that half the men in the UK, in their thirties, “struggle to get an erection” (

Why? Well, 49% blame stress, 24% cite an over-fondness for alcoholic beverages, 36% say they’re just too tired, and 29% blame anxiety. And don’t blame me for that coming out to 133%. Maybe someone’s abacus is broken. Or maybe a lot of guys gave more than one main reason for being stuck in neutral.

And “another one-third have broken up with their partners as a result.” “Pratners” is a word implying indiscriminate fornication.

So… Just like we’ve got this communications revolution but can’t think of much to say, we’ve got this great sexual revolution that leaves half its male participants unable to get out of the starting gate. And I’d better wind up this post in a hurry, because I’m running out of decorous euphemisms.

Hello? Is there anyone out there who really, truly doesn’t know culture rot when they see it? I keep on saying, “Kill the culture, and the culture will kill you back,” but the movers and shakers ain’t hearin’ it. They’d rather just keep on killing the culture.

We have oversexed our popular culture–and undersexed the people who live in it. What a trick! Way to go!

5 comments on “Study Claims Half of UK Men are Impotent

  1. I’d venture to say that porn plays a significant role in all of this. A frighteningly high percentage of younger men are affectively addicted to porn and can’t achieve a state of sexual excitement without it.

  2. I was reading a story the other day about a man who had a similar problem and was even developing female “attributes”, if you know what I mean. The doctors ran all the tests and they came back fine. They were stumped at first, then they looked out his diet. Turns out he was drinking several quarts of soy milk a day. It turns out soy products produce estrogen in men. You will find a lot of this in vegetarian\vegan foods.

  3. It seems to me that this is also the result of big pharma and all the estrogen, anti-anxiety, sedative and sedative medications along with blood pressure, pain, diabetes, etc. medications winding up in our water supply, which then winds up in our drinking water and also watering crops. Seems to me this could be the single biggest contributor. So it’s a win/win for big pharma: they cause the problem and then create another pill – a little blue one – to counter the first problem. Vicious circle.

    1. Not to mention men totally failing to live up to the bizarre expectations of a hypersexualized pop culture. When you expect to fail, you usually do.

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