You can find a multitude of Dr. Anthony Fauci dolls and bobble-heads available for sale on the internet. You can even get him in a lab coat–just as if he were a real doctor who treated real patients, and not a bumbling bureaucrat.
These have many uses–as bowling pins (you’ll need ten of them for that), slingshot targets, cat and dog toys, or missiles to be thrown by hand: uses limited only by the owner’s creativity.
We are unable to confirm reports of these being used as objects of worship by National Public Radio listeners. We continue to research reports that purchase of these will soon be required by Mandate.
So go on out and buy something else! Anything else.