A Few Life Lessons (No Charge)

This is how you wind up if you don’t have a Manifesto or a Task Force.

It’s gonna be really hot today, and I’d better get outside and work on my book before it’s too hot to try. But first–

Here are a few life lessons I’ve picked up. I am sharing them with you so that you won’t have to go to college.

*Every doofus has to have a “Manifesto.” The other doofuses won’t take you seriously if you don’t.

*Every pack of nincompoops acquires instant credibility–at least with the nooze media–by forming a “task force.” For Instance, the Trans Doe Task Force. Noozies are impressed by that, even if the expressed purpose of the “task force” is absurd.

*When calculating the IQ of a Hollywood celebrity, take a monkey’s IQ and divide by two.

*”Choice” is only “choice” if you choose what they want you to choose.

*”Oppressed people” are allowed to commit crimes against persons and property that would land you in jail if you committed them. Oppressed people are also entitled to free stuff squeezed out of your hide by the government. Also, oppressed people can do no wrong and their Feelings outweigh all other considerations.

Master these, talk ’em up loud enough–and you’re on your way to a seat on the Supreme Court. Current court-packing plans feature a total of 881 Supreme Court justices, so it’s not like you have no chance to win one.

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