Quokka University News

Matthew Warhurst on Twitter: "Meet my new mate!! The Quokka! #adorable  #rottnestisland #tour #quokka #quokkaselfies #quokkalove  https://t.co/LJiROoVGH7" / Twitter

Hello up there! Byron the Quokka here on behalf of Quokka University, where we’ve got a new motto: “You wanna be a platypus for the rest of your life?”

I am here to bring you the news that we won’t be bringing you any news today. I mean, who needs nooze on Sunday? And even if we were going to report any nooze, the only event worth mentioning is our Pickup Stix team’s victory over some American politicians who couldn’t understand the rules and kept trying to cheat while everyone was watching. Supposedly they get away with that at home.

This above photo, by the way, was taken by Fang Hsueh Ting, a character in Lee’s college Chinese primer. He doesn’t know we know about such things. Just because you’re in a textbook doesn’t mean you don’t exist!


4 comments on “Quokka University News

  1. Greetings Byron. Unable to make it to church this morning, but getting a little better. Hope you are jolly today

  2. Congratulations on the pickup sticks victory, Byron! I’ll be those silly American politicians tried to bring in truckloads of mail-in sticks, right?

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