Now You Can Get a Degree in Nothing

Okay, back to the post-real world…

This just in from Crayola University: Starting this semester, students can earn a bachelor’s degree in Nothing. Yup, that’s right: Nothing. Students in the Nothing degree program will read nothing, study nothing, learn nothing, and know nothing. Mostly they will play with Play-Doh.

“We had to do it,” said University President I. B. Pillock. “Too many of our students are unable to cope with more traditional degree programs like Women’s Studies, Queer Studies, Chicano Studies, Queer Chicano Studies, and Superhero Studies, etc. At the same time, they are unable to live outside a university environment.

“But we can keep them here for as long as they keep paying their tuition, fees, housing, and everything else. We have hired several new professors who specialize in teaching Nothing, and if it all works out, we will offer post-graduate courses in Nothing. Maybe even a Ph. D. program!”