Kurby the Climate Change Clam by Rigoberta Menchu Dreamcatcher
(Published by the Democrat National Committee, 2016)
Kurby the Clam is tired of dead polar bears floating around his nice, clean ocean. Then his friend Fopsy the Transgender Whale tells him about some incredibly wise people who know how to put a stop to Global Warming. So Kurby hops onto his environmentally safe, rubber band-powered jet ski and goes zooming off to help stop Climate Change.
This new children’s book aims to educate kiddies to the absolute, otherwise-we’re-all-gonna-die necessity of giving government all the money and all the power it needs to control the environment and Save the Planet. Ms. Dreamcatcher is never bashful about praising Climate Change stalwarts like Michael Mann (“the best and wisest man now living”), John Kerry (“the greatest war hero since William the Conqueror”), and Barack Hussein Obama (“He made the sea levels go down!”).
She also makes irrefutable points in favor of Smart Growth and getting rid of air conditioners and refrigerators owned by the common people. As Kurby sagely observes, “Sometimes it’s necessary for deplorable people to give up their luxuries so that really cool and smart people can continue to enjoy them.”
To make the book easier for adults to read aloud to children, the publishers have included a supply of barf bags and a rope with which to tie the child to a chair.
Available at your local United Nations bookstore for a mere $359.95.