Violet Crepuscular, author of the classic romance novel, Oy, Rodney, has been arrested by the Global Literary Authority on an assortment of really serious charges.
“She’s obviously guilty, so there’s no need for a trial,” said a GLA commissar whose identity was concealed under a hood.
Guilty of what? Well, here are some of the charges: Practicing literature without a license; failure to include a Full Spectrum of Gender-Diverse Characters in her novel; being white; and Climate Change Denial. Each one carries the death penalty.
Meanwhile, the GLA intends to “erase” her works. “We plan to track down and buy back all six copies of Oy, Rodney and burn them,” said the commissar. We think it might be Loretta Lynch in her new job.
Ms. Crepuscular was not allowed to comment on her arrest, but she is rumored to have been rather put out about it.