Physics Goes P.C.!

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The student body at CDU–true diversity!

Academics have long strained their brains, trying to figure out how to totally politicize the study of physics. Somehow applying “a feminist post-colonial analysis” to the study of glaciers didn’t quite catch on.

But now, at long last, sages at Cardiff Giant University have come up with “a Diversity-centered curriculum for Physics.”

Among the pearls of wisdom brought forth to tempt us to further study are these:

*”You can be an electron one day and a proton the next, depending on how you feel.”

*”Traditional physics is a neo-colonial White Privilege thingy for biggits.”

*”There are no laws of nature, only mental constructs.”

“Black physics matters!”

This curriculum, says the department head, Professor I.M. Schmendrick, “will once and for all establish that there is nothing, nothing, nothing that can’t be made abysmally stupid! We are truly excited about this. I can hardly wait to make our students swear loyalty oaths to the Democrat Party and to progressive thought in general.”

Students who decline to take the oath, according to the university, will be “encouraged” to remain in Diversity Training until they do.

“They always come around to our way of thinking,” said Schmendrick. “Like, dude, it’s our way or the highway! We’ll have diversity here or else.”

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