When a Bear Comes Calling…

Get a load of this: a great big bear comes climbing up the porch to see if anyone’s home. There being nothing or no one to eat, she decides to leave.

Wait! The bear is wearing a collar. Hmm… And attacked to the collar, it seems, is some kind of little keg. Maybe it’s got whiskey in it. Maybe this critter thinks she’s [wait for it!]…

A St. Bear-nard.


About leeduigon

I have lived in Metuchen, NJ, all my life. I have been married to my wife Patricia since 1977. I am a former newspaper editor and reporter. I was also the owner-operator of my own small business for several years. I wrote various novels and short stories published during 1980s and 1990s. I am a long-time student of judo and Japanese swordsmanship (kenjutsu). I also play chess, basketball, and military and sports simulations. View all posts by leeduigon

7 responses to “When a Bear Comes Calling…

  • marlene

    “A St. Bear-nard” – LOL!! What, no honey?

  • Erlene Talbott

    This reminds me. I visited with a group to a home of one of the members two weeks ago. They live miles up in the timber on a winding road, and they have had bears and cougar walk onto their porch. They also have two young children. That kind of spooked me.

  • unknowable2

    That would have been something to see. I have heard that bears can be friendly, under the right circumstances.

    • leeduigon

      If they turn out to be not the right circumstances after all, you’re out of luck.

      • unknowable2

        Did you ever hear about that video made by a guy that wanted to commune with the grizzlies? He was a first class prize, that thought he could live among wild animals and be accepted because he loved them. The found his video camera, including footage of his demise at the paws of one of the grizzlies he wanted to commune with. I don’t believe in evolution, but I would think of that as natural selection.

        • leeduigon

          Yeah, I heard about him. Cause of death: wishful thinking.

          • unknowable2

            I saw the clips (thankfully, they left out the part where he was being eaten) and this guy was a real prize. Somewhere along the line, a fox grabs a baseball cap and he explains that it is a very important cap, while the fox ignores him. As the fox runs off, he says “I love you” to the fox. This guy seemed to believe he was some sort of Dr. Doolittle.

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