By Popular Demand, ‘Oy, Rodney’

a gripping page-turner headed for the top of the NY Times bestseller list | Romance novels, Funny romance, Book parody

Violet Crepuscular, the Queen of Suspense, addresses her colossal fan base… leaving the editor wondering what happened to Chapter DCXLIV of her epic romance, Oy, Rodney.

“I know, I know, I promised to investigate the ritual poking in the back room at The Lying Tart,” she writes. “But first we must ask WHY my latest installment did not appear on Sunday. I don’t buy those ‘Computer failed me!’ stories.” Sorry, but those are the excuses that we have. There are no others.

Ms Crepuscular admits that ritual poking is of serious concern, hence Constable Chumley’s presence at the scene. “He has had to go undercover,” she writes. “The patrons at The Tart think he’s a ghost and give him a wide berth. From time to time he hears sounds of poking emanating from the back room. So naturally he asks the landlord: ‘Yeerth, mon, gweel me threeds?’ You can easily imagine the reaction he gets for that!”

Ms. Crepuscular is also trying to cope with an insolent reader from Kunjo Korners, Kansas. “Dear Ms. Crepuscular,” this person says, “does ‘suspense’ means ‘nothing freakin’ happens’? Can’t we have a tidal wave, a civil war, a passionate affair–something? Anything? It’s gotta be better than a super-volcano that just burps once and then dies!”

Having read this completely unfair criticism, Ms. Crepuscular has retired to her bed with a tin of toothpaste brownies.

5 comments on “By Popular Demand, ‘Oy, Rodney’

  1. To the reader from KKK (was this acronym deliberate?), I say pish tosh. Have you no sense of narrative nuance?

    Anyway, the Violet Crepuscular plot is getting even more suspenseful than the “Oy, Rodney” plot. So there, KKK reader. 😛😛😛

  2. I’ve been to Kunjo Korners, and it’s a delightful place, except that the residents there are impatient and always seeking for things to be more eventful. Fortunately, the day I drove through, there was a fire in the fireworks factory, three tornadoes, six floods, an invasion of locusts, all before noon. Most of the residents were bored, but at least not looking for a stranger to hassle. 🙂

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