Kowabunga, boys ‘n’ girls! Ready for Quokka University Weekend TV? Well, ready or not, here it is! And I’m your host, Byron the Quokka.
7:14 P.M. Ch. 56 THE WORLD OF WAYNE NEWTON–Horror
Remember Wayne Newton? Well, this is that show about him being a werewolf. And they never caught him, either. Enjoy expert commentary by Joe Pyne, Ariel Durant, and some guy who thinks he’s Ramses II. Brought to you by “The Shoes With Sole”!
7:30 P.M. Ch. 31 WHO’S THE BIG BOY?–Game show
Join host Roscoe Conklin9 and his celebrity panel (Goldie Hawn, Franz Kafka, and Miss Marple) as they try to find out which political contestant is “The Big Boy.” Intelligible speech and clean undies are a plus! Winner gets to say he’s Joe Biden and everyone has to agree with him.
Ch. 62 MOVIE–Sort of a detective movie, but without a crime
Lu Pu-shou stars as Ian MacTavish in I Lives Face-Down, Me Lads. Can MacTavish continue to solve crimes after people stop committing them? And don’t miss the famous scene with the uncooperative newts. Judge Wing Wong: Shamus O’Flynn. Miss Daisy: a 1938 Packard. Blackbeard the Priate: the guy from Daktari.
8 P.M. Ch. 14 BASEBALL: NEW YORK SAVAGES VS. PISCATAWAY, N.J., SHRINKING VIOLETS–Live sports
Somehow the Savages never beat the Shrinking Violets, even though it takes at least 15 minutes of encouragement and comfort to get a Violets’ batter out of the dugout and into the batter’s box. “Heads will roll” if they don’t win this time, snarls Savages Manager Zorba the Geek. None of the Shrinking Violets gave an interview.
Well, that’s that, everybody! As you can see, I’m rushing home to catch that Wayne Newton show. We quokkas laugh ourselves silly when we see it.
See yiz next week! Byron the Quokka, signing off
I’ll definitely agree that Wayne Newton belongs in the horror category. Musicians I’ve known, and respect, consider him a selfish child.
Well, it seems that some things on this computer are working again. if this gets there, I will be much encouraged. from Erlene
It got here and I’m reading it–hooray!
Wonderful. It has been a long and miserable time, and it still is not working as it
used to, but anything is better than nothing.
At least you got the TV listings.