G’day, boys ‘n’ gulls! Byron the Quokka here, with a weekend of glorious TV brought to you by Quokka University. We could only dig up four headliners this week, but take it from me, they’re all gems! Here they are:
4:44 P.M., Ch. 16 PUSHERS!–Totally puerile comedy
It’s not what you think! No–the PUSH Squad pushes fishermen off their municipal fishing piers–into the drink they go! Don’t worry–nobody has actually drowned, and there’ve been no injuries that the local hospital can’t handle. This week: Can the Squad make tracks before the police get there?
5:00 P.M., Ch. 22 CHILLY ACRES–Fabulous sitcom
Welcome to Chilly Acres, Greenland’s one and only nudist colony! This week: Inuit tribesmen protest the expansion of the colony, but no one cares because they’re all too busy trying to get warm. It is not known why any of them ever joined up in the first place.
Ch. 30, SUBURBAN SAFARI–Guaranteed to make you sleep
Join Great White Hunter Jim Phosphate as he leads paying guests on another fruitless “suburban safari,” this time in Edison Township, NJ. Lion, elephant, gazelle–you name it, they’ll never see it. Special guest: Shirley Moulder, looking to bag her first starling.
5:06 P.M., Ch. 41 THE BAT FAMILY–Existentialist sitcom
John and Jenny Pantagruel (Forrest Tucker, Sandy Duncan) like to sleep hanging from the ceiling by their feet–which causes problems in school for the twins, Jasper and Casper. They also make odd noises in the supermarket. This week: the twins start digging their escape tunnel. Can the collected essays of Jean-Paul Sartre stop them?
How about it–are you pumped for these shows? Because there’s more where they came from.
I think this chewy leaf will go very well with this week’s episode of Suburban Safari!
Reading Sartre can stop anyone — and bagging starlings is a serious business. Sounds like a truly fascinating lineup of shows.