It’s not just that everything hurts, including unmentionable pains in unmentionable places, hip and knees betraying me, etc., etc. But I am worried about it coming after my soul.
There are times when being this sick feels like it’s the only thing that ever was, or ever will be, for me. What? You were playing basketball? How many years ago was that? You carried in an armload of groceries? Tell us another one!
This is dangerous, treading this close to depression. I need to pray harder. Or, as a woman said on the radio, many years ago, “Pray louder.” I don’t think it’s because God can’t hear your prayers unless you shout them. He can always hear you. But sometimes, it seems, you need to hear yourself.
O Lord my God! Carry me safely over these shoals, as you so surely can. My own strength will not suffice; but yours is inexhaustible. Heavenly Father, left up my spirit: in Jesus’ name, Amen.