‘Toxic Fiction’ (2013)

DALLAS | J.R EWING FUNNY MOMENTS - YouTube

Ooh-ooh! I wanna be a TV villain! I don’t have a show, but I can still be a villain!

Toxic Fiction

Many of you are way to young to remember Dallas, a red-hot hit of a TV show starring Larry Hagman as iconic antihero J.R. Ewing. J.R. captured the public’s imagination: the more evil he did, the more they liked him.

Well, we don’t need J.R. or Dallas anymore; we have real-life villains that make him look like a philanthropist, and the daily nooze coming out of the Biden administration puts Dallas in the shade. And unlike Dallas, it’s on every day, not once a week. J.R. was a saint compared to these stiffs.

‘Stupid Masterminds!’ (2012)

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Prof. Moriarty, as captured in Strand Magazine

It’s pretty much a ghost town here this morning, with zero comments and just three likes, and one reader sort of standing in the empty street wondering where everybody went. Oh, well… We have not yet recovered from July.

Meanwhile, why are our real-life villains so stupid compared to fictional villains?

Stupid Masterminds!

And this was written years before anybody thought we ought to have a senile Joe Biden for our president and a Green New Deal to murder our economy–just in case any of it survives the coronavirus panic. Our villains hatch schemes that are guaranteed to fail!

But at least they all get rich, doing it. No one comes home poor from Capitol Hill.