More ‘Work Wanted–College Grad’

Image result for images of silly superhero

Spotted on the bulletin board at the Fimbo College Social Justice Intersectional Boombatz Center: “work wanted” ads posted by students who were graduated in June and are now feeling the pinch.

SUPERHERO EXPERT! Your child may has what it takes To be a Superhero, but how would you know? Hire me to monnator your child for Superhero Tendoncies! Give me room and board and salary and I’ll do the rest!!

I CAN TEATCH YOU how to spot Micro-Aggressions! And who to call if you hear one! AND HOW TO WIND UP GETTING MONEY $$ OUT OF IT! Don’t let Them offend you any more!!

WORK WANTED: VIDDEO GAME TRAINER! I just spend four (4) years earning a Degree in Viddeo Game Strageties, and I CAN HELP YOUR SCORES GO UP, WAY UP! Beleave me, I’VE GOT GAME!! And you can have it too! Hire your own LIVE-IN GAMING COATCH!!

I WILL GIVE YOU TOTAL EMOTIONAL SUPPORT!! Nothing Studies Major, 6 year Associate Degree. TIRED OF GETTING NO RESPECT?? I WILL PRAIZE YOU ALL DAY EVERY DAY!! I am the One who will tell you how fantastic and amazing you are! Great for self-esteem! With me around, YOU WILL NEVER FEEL LIKE A LOSER AGAIN!! Salary negotiabble as long as it’s $1,000 at least.

There were more, but now I’m sitting in the eye doctor’s waiting room and can’t write anything else.

7 comments on “More ‘Work Wanted–College Grad’

  1. At first I thought Joe Collidge was the one with the degree in Nothing Studies, but then I realized that (a) Joe hasn’t graduated, and (b) his spelling isn’t this good. 🙂

      1. Ah, but is “earning” compatible with Nothing Studies in the first place? I think we have a paradox here. (Tee hee.)

  2. According to Thomas Sowell, the college grads who degrees can’t get them good paying jobs end up working for the government.

    Wait until Joe figures out he can make more money drawing welfare than working, then he will drop out of college and have it made.

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