G’day–or not. Byron the Quokka here, and it’s official: here at this blog, July’s a disaster.
Daily viewership is down by 120 views a day. Ouch! But that’s only the blog. If you think we’re having a picnic at Quokka University, think again!
We have lost our most celebrated special guest lecturer before the semester even starts. Professor Aristotle Bottle, “the one-man philosophy course,” the Living Legend of Smartness, world-renowned author of Wet Wood Burns the Best–holy cow, we’re not gonna have him! He has been hospitalized after attempting to prove that an open manhole cover does not necessarily imply the existence of a manhole. Broke his coccyx going down.
Well, I’m glad we haven’t charged any money for his lectures, and I’m glad we didn’t pay him up front. But how do you replace a superstar like that?
We’re open to suggestions!
July 12th, 2020 at 1:53 pm
It’s hard to think of anyone as smart as Aristotle Bottle, with such a demonstrated grasp on reality, but what about Alexandria Occasional-Cortex?
July 12th, 2020 at 3:56 pm
I don’t think we want Quokka U. to get that kind of reputation.
July 13th, 2020 at 4:54 pm
How about using a hologram of Edgar Rice Burroughs lecturing on the essence of Tarzan and how modern Tarzan versions have missed the vine.
July 13th, 2020 at 4:56 pm
Even Tarzan couldn’t save this month.
July 13th, 2020 at 6:10 pm
Okay, then, how about Constable Chumley? With an interpreter, of course.
July 17th, 2020 at 6:46 am
Hope here’s another view and comment!