Introducing (or not) Chapter DCLXIX of her epic romance, Oy, Rodney, Violet Crepuscular, The Queen of Suspense, shares an intimate moment with her readers.
“I always listen to publishers,” she writes, “so when a major New York publisher told me to go soak my head, I took it literally and did my best to comply. Only later did I realize that ‘literally’ really meant literarily–as in one literary personage to another.”
Having filled her sink with water, Violet reports, “I’m sorry, but I just couldn’t breath with my whole head under water! I think I almost drowned! I must of tried this half a dozen times, and always got water up my nose when I tried to breathe.”
Meanwhile, in Scurveyshire, the June Taylor Dancers having kicked the rampaging rhinoceros out of the town, the troupe has set itself up as the new absolute rulers of the town and instituted mandatory dancing lessons.So one problem has replaced another.
In his capacity of Justice of the Peace, Lord Jeremy Coldsore has ordered Constable Chumley to arrest the June Taylor Dancers–although fitting them all into the town’s single little jail cell has created yet another problem. As the constable remarked, “Yea the vimbers hallis brogh!” Who can disagree?
Ah, I do love the eloquence of Constable Chumley. But maybe mandatory dancing lessons would help some of the Scurveyshire denizens to stop falling all over themselves, not to mention into or under the vicar’s wading pool. Of course, Lady Margo Cargo might find dancing a bit difficult with her upholstered wooden leg….
I sometimes wonder what new readers would make of these latest episodes of – and comments on – “Oy, Rodney.” Or Joe Collidge’s adventures, for that matter. 🙂
Gee, I wish I knew.
I suppose I could say “Try it, you’ll like it.”
I’ve always been suspicious of the June Taylor dancers.
I’m sorry, but I have never gotten into reading ‘Oy, Rodney.’ Therefore, I don’t think I’ve ever made a comment about it. But for some reason, today’s title “The Tyranny of the June Taylor Dancers,” piqued my interest, and I had to take a look. Those June Taylor Dancers kicking the rampaging rhinoceros out of the town, got to me…ha, ha, ha…
Oy, Rodney archives go way back.
Would that be the “stone age”? Yeah, you know, the stone age, that took place a few years before cell phones. Times were rough way back then. We had to get up, and walk over to the TV to change the channel or turn the volume up or down. And on a good day, you might receive four of five channels, depending on which way the antenna was pointing.
Mike, you speak unspeakable horror. 🙂
Well, you are correct I can’t speak about it, but I can put a few words down on paper of those long long long ago days of unspeakable horrors. In my distant past, at one time we had a black and white screen TV. And before they paved the road in front of our house, a few times each summer, to keep the dust down on the gravel, a tanker truck would spray oil on the road. And I drank from the garden hose! Had squirt guns, ran barefoot, and played with firecrackers, and stole M80’s from my dad’s room, and me and my brother blew up his model cars, and we still have all of our fingers. Went trick or treating, got so much candy it lasted for months, ate as much as I wanted, until, all that was left was the just the stuff no one liked.
It wasn’t Array who wrote that post…there are still things wrong with posting things on here. Well, anyway my post did appear. Let’s see where this one goes, and who is given credit.
Mike, I’m afraid that one was my fault–hit the wrong key, comment disappears. I’ve been trying to fix it… but when I restored it to its proper place, it said “Array.” I don’t know why.