Category Archives: Just for Fun

Cats & Tots: Beyond the Galaxy

I blame Byron the Quokka for that headline. I didn’t mean to write it. He distracted me.

Anyway, check out these infants and toddlers having fun with their families’ cats. Some young children take cats very seriously. Once, in a spirit of jest, I suggested to my granddaughter that I might tell our cat, Henry, about her latest lapse in judgment. She cried out, “No, no! Not Henry! Don’t tell Henry!” So of course I didn’t.


Important Announcement! (from Byron the Quokka)

See the source image

G’day, it’s me, Byron the Quokka, with a super-important announcement!

We now have just over 45,000 comments on this blog, and Lee says I can start another comment contest as long as I don’t promise that the winner gets a bicycle.

So OK, new comment contest, with the finish line at 47,000, which means that the next contest will be for No. 50,000, a real milestone–and those dumb  wombats said we’d never make it! But first this contest. Whoever posts Comment No. 47,000 wins the prize.

I don’t know what he’s got against giving away bicycles. [Editor’s Note: Byron, it wasn’t ours to give! How many times do I have to tell you that?] So I guess an autographed copy of his new book, The Temptation–and if you’ve already got it, you can ask for a different book.

I don’t know. A bag of pretzels and a can of Foster’s, that might really get people hopping…

And by the way, hopping is better than walking. Ask any quokka.


Pizza Thieves

Boy, was there a lot of nooze I didn’t cover today; and I’m not gonna, either. Instead, turn we unto a cat video, as Sir Thomas Malory would say. Or would have, had they had any cat videos in 1483.

What did cats do before pizza was invented? The cats in this video are crazy for pizza. And the humans want to be on Youtube, so they encourage the cats to steal food. You be the judge of which species is the more intelligent.


Cats Chasing Shadows

I have it from a thoroughly unreliable source that the song “Me and My Shadow” was originally written for a cat named Xerxes.

Cats will chase shadows–yours or their own, it makes no difference to them. Problems only crop up when they catch one.

My cats have not the slightest interest in shadows. But oh, do they love bugs!


Dogs Acting Guilty (Again)

You know you’ve got a problem when you have to ask, “Who killed the rat and brought it inside?”

Poor dogs. They’re so ashamed when you upbraid them for doing something wrong. It’d be nice if “educators” had that capacity. The thing with dogs, though, is that they only know it was wrong after they’ve done it. But then it’s too late.

It’s not that a dog has no conscience. It’s that he has a tardy conscience–always one key step behind.


Amuse a Cat Today

Admit it–when you watch a cat playing, don’t you wish that you could move like that?

The cat in this video is amused by balls, the more, the merrier. He gathers them up, but he’s too excited to keep them all in one place. My cats don’t give a hang for balls. The thing that really turns them on is bugs, and one is naturally averse to bringing too many of those into one’s home. I wish I could get them to play with fuzzy balls. The cats, that is; not the bugs.


Trouble in Scurveyshire (‘Oy, Rodney’)

Image result for images of silly romance novels

I am happy to report that Byron the Quokka has returned. He was not able to squeeze Ms. Crepuscular through the bars of the holding cell, but he did succeed in rescuing the manuscript, along with a note from Violet to her readers. We quote:

“My dear readers, it’s really too silly for words, my being in jail like this for the sake of a few harmless toothpaste rolls which I eat all the time and have never gotten sick! True, Mr. Pitfall ate all two dozen of them–but it wasn’t my fault, I couldn’t stop him. And it’s not like he’s died or anything! The doctors expect him to be back on his feet in just a year or two. My thanks to Byron the Whatchamacallit for saving my manuscript! The detective who read it said he would surely destroy it, as a service to world literature. Yours sincerely, Violet M. Crepuscular.” She will not tell us what the M stands for.

Moving on, we now have a Chapter CCCI of her epic romance, Oy, Rodney, which is somewhat below her usual artistic standard–or anyone else’s, for that matter. In this chapter, all of Scurveyshire, led by the few survivors of the Peasants Benevolent Assn., is in an uproar. They have assembled at Coldsore Hall to yell at Lord Jeremy.

“They’ll skedaddle, ol’ hoss, if you let me shoot a few of ’em,” offers the American adventurer, Willis Twombley. “Back home, them Elamites was always tryin’ to riot their way into my palace.” He thinks he is Sargon of Akkad. “But they always gave up when my archers started usin’ ’em for target practice.”

“I’m dashed if I can see my way to that, old boy,” expostulates (I just work here) Lord Jeremy. “If they’d just stay away from that deuced wading pool in the vicar’s back yard, they wouldn’t get sucked under it in droves.” He finally placates the mob by promising to get rid of Black Rodney, the medieval sorcerer responsible for all these objectionable happenings.

“How you gonna do that, Germy?” wonders Twombley. “Him bein’ a ghost and all, and havin’ just blown half the roof off’n your house, I mean.”

Jeremy smiles slyly. “But we now know what he’s afraid of, don’t we?” he replies. “Antimacassars! We’ll drape antimacassars over all the shire!”

Here the chapter breaks off. She had to stop writing, Byron reports, because the jailer was coming to take her for a walk. He had only time to gather up the manuscript and, as he put it, “vamoose!” The quokkas have been watching a lot of old Westerns lately.


Byron the Quokka to the Rescue!

Image result for images of quokkas

Imagine my dismay last night, at precisely 2:17 a.m., when my agents informed me that Violet Crepuscular has been arrested for that business with the toothpaste rolls, and her manuscript of Oy, Rodney been impounded by police. Something had to be done before the cops burned the papers.

Byron the Quokka has been sent to rescue Ms. Crepuscular–he’s sure he can get in and out of the police station, and in and out of the holding cell, without anyone seeing or hearing him–and safely retrieve the manuscript. He promises success. It seems a great-aunt of his once sprang H.G. Wells from jail.

Well, if he’s not back in another two hours, I’ll have to presume they did catch him, after all, and then find someone to rescue him.

Any volunteers?

 


‘My Enhanced Bio’ (2015)

See the source image

You name it, I’ve been there

I’ve been saving this post for a time when something just has to be done to pump up this blog’s readership; and that time is now.

https://leeduigon.com/2015/09/04/my-enhanced-bio/

You may think that this is all of my biography. You’d be wrong! I can invent more as needed. If certain presidential candidates can do it, then why not me?

I’d just like to think I do it better.


Cats Gone Fishin’

These are some pretty snazzy fish tanks. How come, whenever you see a nice fish tank in a movie, it always (!) winds up being knocked down and broken?

Cats love fish tanks. “This is the dawning of the Age of Aquariums!” If your aquarium is too big for your cat to tip over, then it’s big enough for him to fall in. Kind of rough on the fish, wouldn’t you say?


%d bloggers like this: