Hey, you–America’s colleges and universities! Are you still here? Why? What good are you doing?
At the University of Texas, Austin, this week, “student activists” marched to demand hydroponic cilantro (https://www.wsj.com/articles/college-activists-march-on-the-cafeteria-what-do-we-want-hydroponic-cilantro-1504712705). “Wadda we want? Hydroponic cilantro! When do we wannit? Now!” In fact, these food protests are springing up on collidge campuses all across the country. At U Tex they had to hire a second college dietician because the first found herself “overwhelmed” by the sudden spate of new demands–by “feisty vegans” in particular.
Fun Fact! Over the past 30 years, college tuition, overall, has increased 400%!
As one student said, “If you’re not eating good things, how do they expect your brain to grow?”
Well, Sunshine, you’re a collidge student, so we actually expect your brain not to grow, but shrink.
Question for the colleges and universities!
What are we supposed to do with these millions of disgruntled “students,” once you’ve finished with them? They’re too spoiled and unreliable to be employed in any useful capacity, and much too disagreeable to serve as pets. They have degrees in ridiculous subjects like Gender Studies and Advanced Comic Book Studies and their brains have atrophied, thanks to you. What in the world are we supposed to do with them?
America’s colleges and universities are a millstone around her neck… and the water’s getting deeper.