‘We Have Hired an Academic Superstar!’ (2020)

Quokka - Album on Imgur

Quokka University made some notable progress in 2020–most notably of all, the hiring of international cleftonics icon Dr. Helmut Shimble as a professor of something or other.

We Have Hired an Academic Superstar!

Of course, it ain’t cheap hiring these superstars, they don’t work for nothing. We done found some of the money by taking it out of the English grammar budget. Like, we don’t need no grammar!

There’s also the very real prospect that no one who signs up for his course will ever learn anything–but that’s not the point, is it? This is Higher Education!

3 comments on “‘We Have Hired an Academic Superstar!’ (2020)

  1. I was so excited about Quokka University being established, especially their sports program, but now the shine is off. I thought they were going to be well-polished intellectuals, but it seems I thought wrong.

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