Oh, for Shame!

Prince Dadian

Nineteenth-century Russian princes could do things that only big-name Democrats and politically-approved scientists can do today. That is, cheat like mad and get away with it. Even in chess.

Enter Prince Dadian of Mingrelia, who published 38 games he played against some of the top players in the world, winning every single one of them. Modern chess historians smell a rat.

Dadian is believed to have composed chess games that were never actually played, or to have had them composed by others, and then published them as brilliant victories. Chess players in the 19th century, as a class, were usually short of money (“The fame I have. It’s money that I need!” said Wilhelm Steinitz). The prince helped them out, it is strongly suspected, by paying them to lose games to him–even going so far as to write their moves for them in advance. He would also pull strings–again, not proved, but very strongly suspected–to have uncooperative chess stars kicked out of resorts like Monte Carlo.

He would fit right in today. He’d probably be hawking Climate Change instead of chess; there’s more money in it. Or else he’d be president of a teachers’ union.

We didn’t invent cheating in our era. We just made it more lucrative.

More on the Chess Cheating Scandal

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The lead story on the radio nooze this morning was some celebrity Hollywood doofus and her husband could actually go to jail for doling out up to half a million bucks in bribes, to get their two dumb kids into a “prestige” university. What for, who knows?–so they can “learn” that “white people own time”? But the point is, these rich and famous people cheated.

I’ve been thinking about a much smaller cheating scandal–the cheat performed by the Henderson middle school in Texas, to win the U.S. Chess Federation’s national scholastic chess championship (https://leeduigon.com/2019/04/08/teaching-kids-to-cheat-at-chess/).

Most of the cheating in high-level chess is hi-tech, but any team can, like Henderson, resort to “sandbagging” (https://www.chess.com/blog/SamCopeland/how-to-cheat-at-chess). Your team enters a bunch of low-level tournaments and throws all its games to weak opponents, to drive your rating down in time for the big important tournament that you really want to win. Your new crummy ratings insure easy match-ups and lots of cheap wins on your way to the title.

But the Henderson team got caught, and will be stripped of the championship.

Some questions remain to be answered.

Did the parents know their kids were cheating? Or suspect it, and say nothing?

When the USCF declared that the whole business was orchestrated by the coach, did the school fire him? Did school officials ever suspect there was cheating, but chose to look the other way?

If this had happened at the junior high school I went to in 1962, a) the coach would have been fired immediately, because the community would have angrily demanded it; and b) the principal would’ve been on the intercom toot-sweet, announcing that the chess team, having brought disgrace upon the school, was as of that moment disbanded.

How deep does this go? Cheat to get your kid into college. Cheat to win at chess. Then brag about it? Pretend the achievement was real, and brag about it?

America doesn’t need less Christianity in its schools.

It needs much, much more.

(I have asked my colleagues at Chessgames.com, all of whom have more chess tournament experience than I do, to weigh in on this. I’ll pass on their opinions, if they offer them.)

 

 

Teaching Kids to Cheat at Chess

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It’s easier if you cheat!

Let me hear it again. “I send my children to public schools to get ‘socialized’ there because____________.” Fill in the blank and win a tin foil hat.

Henderson Middle School in El Paso, Texas, recently won the U.S. Chess Federation’s National Scholastic (K-9) Championship… not! They’re going to be stripped of the title because they cheated (http://www.startribune.com/burnsville-chess-team-may-get-national-championship-after-texas-team-found-to-have-cheated/506849112/).

It was “organized and directed” by the coach, said the USCF. To prepare for the national tournament, the Henderson team entered some lesser tournaments and threw “virtually all their games.” All those losses drove their ratings down, which translated into easier match-ups–much easier!–in the national tournament. The practice is common enough to have a common name: “sandbagging.” I’ve encountered it myself, at online chess sites.

The coach denies everything and says “inconsistent play” is to be expected because his players come from “economically disadvantaged backgrounds,” so there–take that, you racists, you!

Anyhow, the USCF is going to take back all the laurels and bestow them on the team that came in second… And then someday there’ll be a TV movie about how all themb Biggits conspired to strip these Poor Kids of their hard-earned glory… and it’s Donald Trump’s fault! Break out the violins.

Two lessons have been taught here.

*If you have to cheat to get what you want, cheat.

*When you get caught cheating, play the race card every time.

And that about sums up public schooling, nowadays.