how to be Woke – Lee Duigon

Artificial respiration | Britannica

Heer “at” Collidge we alyaws “are” Try to get moar and maor Woak becose yiu Jist cant “get” Tooo Woak!!!! and So our Stoodint Soviet we has voated “to” Ban Artrafissile Repserration AND aslo CPR!!!!!

As yiu can sea fromb “The” pixture,, theez heer things they can maik yore Arms and Leggs fawl offf!!!!!!! but that isnt wye we band themb!!

No! Wee band Artrophycial Rasporassion becose It Is Kisssing!!!! It is Kisssing whith-oat Consent!!!!!!!!! Waht cood be moar Secksist???

And CPR it “is” jist “the” saim!!!! It is dooing somb thing To somb boddy whith-oaut thare Con-Sent!!!!! I mean comb on Man (pressadint Bydin he sayes That al “the” Tyme!!)!!! Lyke, watt “iff” thay doughnt Whant no CPR??? Watt iff “thay” doughnt whant no Icky Perdson who probbly has The Vyris kisssing themb???

Whell of coarse The Woak Thing “to do” is to jist leeve themb Aloan!!!!!!!!!!

We “Are” alll prowd Of our Woak=ness heer!!!

Somb Hater he sayed whell yiu “doughnt ask” a Baybe’s Con-Sennt befoar yiu has a Bortion, do yiu???? Butt we jist beet “himb” up!!!!!

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Well Ha Ha Ha!!! Whoo sayed Collidge it is “Usetliss”?”

Wile evry boddy Ells thay “are” wurryed Abuot ketching Co-Vid and get sick “And” dye,, heer “At” Collidge we are Toatilly Protecktid becose we has Co-Vid Cake!!!!

This heer “Caik” it wus infentid By twoo “Of” the commasars on our Stoodint Soviet and it “Is” a jenyuwine Woke Caik and eeting it maiks yiu a Troo Socile Jutstus Wirer!!!!!! It aslo meens yiu Cant ketch Co-Vid!!!! How Grate is that???

I amb not Shur waht “The” In-Greejints are but i know “thare” “is” a Ressapee in It somwear and aslo Spacial Woke Herbs and flower razed by Jenyuwine Thurd Wurld Pessants and you know It “is” reely woke becose “It” taists Horrabble!!!! That is how yiu Know “it” Whurks!!!! Some Hater Biggit he tryed it “and” he sayed it taistid Lyke Cat Hairs and thare is Probbly Cat Hairs in it so we beet himb Up!!!!!

Annyhow Nhow that we has eetin The Caik we “can” Has moar Riots and Protists and knot has to wurry Abuot ketching Co-Vid,, “the” ownly thing we has got to Wurry abuot is what to Protist!!! I amb a littel wurryed abuot Hair Balls tooo^ i rember my Muthers Cat he yused to get Hair Balls and it was Verry Dis-Gusting!!!!! i hoap i doughnt get no Hair Balls,, i had a lot of Caik and i doughnt feeel So goood!!!!!!