yoga pants – Lee Duigon

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Hear at Our Collidge thay has started Yogur class for alumini and Interllecturals and i think Yogur “it is”” somthing that yiu “eat” butt i supose “it” is aslo al Theese hear Yogur Extrasizes and I gess yiu eat “The” Yogur afftar yiu “do the” Extrasize.!

So i runned over to the Stodent Centaur to get in “the class” and thay Toled me i culdnt Unlest i has Yogur Pants and i dint Know “waht” to “do” becose I dont know waht Yogur Pants thay look like!! and al i culd Think “of” saying was yiu Doing “the Micro Gresion on me!”” so thay let me in the Class whith-out Yogur Pants!

Now i amb al Soar from doing The Yogur and one “of “” my Moth Antenners it got bent and it sure herts!!! But that “it is” a Smalll price to Pay “becose” Yogur it keep yiu From turning “in-to” a christin, the Instrocter she sayed Yogur “it teeches” yiu That Yiu Are God!! How Abot That!!! it is jist “Waht” my prefesser he been sayin Al Allong, first yiu takes Gender Studies corses like me and than Yiu assines youself Whatevver gender yiu whant and yiu Can evvin make Up one iff yiu “dont” like any of the Genders that got listed “in” the Stodent Gyde and That “is How” we Creeights our selfs! and than i eated Some Yogur butt in Al Onesty i like jim sox bettter!!

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My old alma mater, Rutgers University, has invited me to an alumni yoga class. They recommend I bring yoga pants, but I don’t think I have any.

Let’s see… how has Rutgers featured in the news lately? Some of you will remember these items from when I posted them on this blog.

There was the professor who had to be carted off by the cops when he raved, in front of his class, about his desire to kill white people. He’s white, by the way.

We had Rutgers students demanding that “trigger warnings” be pasted onto just about every book you can find. They were afraid The Great Gatsby might give them the horrors.

There was the Rutgers Student Guide that warned incoming freshmen that there’s no freedom of speech at Rutgers, so they’d just all better zip their lips. You never know when some innocent thing you say will turn out to be a microaggression.

And, if memory serves, Rutgers is one of those great universities pioneering in Beyonce Studies, for those whose tuition money really does just grow on trees.

You can probably guess what I say whenever they call me up to ask for a donation.

And I think I’ll pass on the alumni yoga class. I just don’t have the pants for it.