In a new scientific study funded by George Sauros and Diversity News, scientists report that the Untied States is home to “at least 150 million white supremacists–who are, moreover, directly responsible for Climate Change, COVID-19, and everybody else’s failures.”
“They like to say a lot of these people aren’t white at all,” said project director Dearie O’Leary, B.S., “but we are going all the way with our computer model! Computers don’t lie! Science doesn’t lie! Eeeeeyaaaah!”
“A good 20 minutes went into the creation of that computer model!” declared the assistant director, Gender Studies Professor I Feelz Pretty. “This is all about Social Justice! This is about saving America from the American people. And sometimes you have to destroy things to save them.”
Diversity News Anchor Kim Jong Un Clydesdale, in an interview with a terrapin, suggested “150 million white supremacists is probably low-balling it. Betcha anything it’s more like 250 million! I’ve heard President Biden keeps the real number in his sock drawer–wherever that is. He hasn’t seen it lately.”
What to do about 150-250 million white supremacists?
“Suffice it to say that whatever it turns out to be, the answer will be scientific! with a capital C!” said Ms. O’Leary.