adulting – Lee Duigon

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Authoritarian governments like for their people to be like children–ignorant, helpless, incompetent, unable to live independently.

And so, a few years ago, UK scientists announced their discovery that the brain is “still developing” (!) at 25… At 25, they concluded, you’re still a child.

Postponing Adulthood… Forever?

After all, you wouldn’t want to “rush them into adulthood”! Someday, maybe, the brain does become an adult brain and you can finally be trusted with a credit card.

I wonder if we could have a contest to name things in our culture that make or encourage adults to remain in a state of perpetual childhood. I wonder how long a list that would be.

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How come it’s so easy for frogs, but not for people?

Some of our great colleges and looniversities are trying to find out what an “adult” is (https://www.campusreform.org/?ID=11710). Nobody seems to know. There appears to be a lot of tension. At what point, exactly, does one become an “adult”? And how do you get out of it?

Is it when you can drink adult beverages and watch adult movies?

“You know, that’s a pretty good answer!” says Dr. Emmet Landfill, department head of Nothing Studies at Wrongful Death University. “If they sell you the booze and let you in to see the movie, you’ve made it!”

But other academics, equally learned and wise, disagree.

“At no point in life does any human person ever become an adult!” asserts Professor Gertrude Windex, dean of fuzzy puppies at East Pakistan Teachers College. “For pete’s sake, why do you think we’ve invented the term, adulting? Adulting is a process, man! Like a Monopoly board with an infinite number of squares! And anyone who says otherwise should be expelled!”

So no one agrees. In fact, the only thing the the professors all agree upon is that everyone should go to college and stay there for as long as possible.